


Life's Too Short.

by hypatia32



Category: The 100 (TV), clexa - Fandom
Genre: Adoption, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, Basketball, Cancer, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Roommates, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-16
Updated: 2016-06-04
Packaged: 2018-06-02 13:07:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 29,552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6567619
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hypatia32/pseuds/hypatia32
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clarke and Lexa are roommates who do not like each other. They dislike each other more when they are on the same college basketball team. But things happen and they realize life is too short to hate someone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. You have got to be kidding me.

It's a bright warm day here at Polis University. I've transferred here to do art instead of getting my medical degree at my previous college. My two best friends have already been attending here so I decided to jump on board. Unfortunately there are no triple dorm rooms available at this time so Octavia and Raven share their dorm like they always have and I'm with a stranger.

I'm carrying a box of my stuff up to my new dormroom with Octavia and Raven in tow also carrying boxes. I pull out my key that the RA just gave me moments ago and slip it into the key lock on the door of room 206. I try turning it but it won't budge.

“What's the hold up Griff?” Raven asks

“The lock isn't unlocking.” I huff. But suddenly the door swings open and a tall brunette with bright green eyes wearing a snapback and a look that could kill is standing in front of me. I look her up and down, she looks intense with her black jeans and black jersey and black eyeliner. But then her bare feet seem to make her not so scary.

“Can I help you?” She seems annoyed.

“Uh...Yeah thanks for opening the door, my key wouldn't unlock it.”

“Did you think that maybe it is because you have the wrong door?” She folds her arms over her chest.

“This is room 206, correct?”

“Yes it is.” 

“Then i'm your new roommate.” 

“You have got to be kidding me.” She looks me up and down before sighing and steps away from the door moving back to her desk where her laptop is open. All three of us follow her in.

“Nice view of campus you got Clarke.” Octavia observes. We stack my boxes on my side of the room.

“We will go get the rest, you stay and get to know...your roomie.” Raven doesn't look very impressed with my new roommate. And so far i'm not too fond of her either. They both leave without another word and the air in the room becomes awkward.

“So, I'm Clarke Griffin.” I stick my hand out to shake hers. She looks down at it but doesn't take it. I drop my hand awkwardly.

“Lexa Woods.” She takes a defensive stand, crossing her arms and widening her leg stance. Staring at me hard. “I'm here to study and to focus on my school, this room is not the party room. I will report you if you bring drugs here. We are not friends and we won't be. No loud music or trash left in the room. I don't tolerate my room smelling like sex, so keep it in your pants or in someone else's dorm. I know your type and I don't mix well with it.” I'm taken back by how rude this conversation turned out.

“You don't know anything about me. I'm not considered a ‘type’.” I scowl at her. “I'm here to learn just as much as you are but I do know how to have fun when I feel like it, unlike you who seems to have a stick shoved up your ass.” She raises her eyebrows, somewhat surprised that i bit back just as hard as she did.

“Wow well this should be fun.” Octavia says from the doorway. “How about you don't try and kill each other the first day of meeting, hmm?” She and Raven put the rest of my stuff down. “Come on Clarke, let's go get some food.” I don't argue as they drag me out the door. The irritation i'm feeling towards Lexa doesn't calm down until we sit down for lunch and I get some food in my stomach. 

“You all planning on joining anything this semester?” I ask as I chew on a french fry.

“I'm getting into boxing!” Octavia says with wide excited eyes.

“Of course you are. You love beating the crap out of people.” Raven rolls her eyes.

“I do. Plus there is this really attractive boxing instructor.” She nearly drools.

“Of course. What about you Raven?” I ask.

“Well I'm thinking about being an assistant to the girls basketball coach.” Octavia and I both look at her funny because sports is not Ravens thing. She shrugs a shoulder “There is this girl i'm kinda seeing and she’s apparently one of the captains.” She focuses hard on her food trying to ignore Octavia and my dropped jaws.

“What is up with you two doing weird things to try and date people.” I snort and get hit with french fries from my two best friends. “Either way I love you both.”

“Yeah i was hoping you'd say that because I need you to join the team.” Raven looks at me with big puppy dog eyes

“Excuse me?” My eyebrows shoot up to my hairline.

“Oh come on! You were the star player in high school, you got scholarships Clarke. I know you miss the game.” And I honestly do miss the game. The adrenaline and the banter and the way it made me feel so alive. “Nothing is holding you back now.” Raven says gently, referring to when I had to drop out of basketball during my junior year because I was diagnosed with cancer. That was a really hard year. But the doctors seemed to have gotten it all. Its been four and a half years now and still no sign of cancer again. 

“Yeah...Maybe you're right, I should try out.” I give her a small smile which she returns with a big one. “But why do you want me to join?”

“Duhh so she doesn't look like she’s stalking this girl she’s sorta dating.” O responded and Raven hits her in the arm. “What? Its true.” We finish up our lunch and head back to their dorm for awhile because I'm not ready to face my room mate just yet.

______________________________________________

Its been a week since classes started and thankfully with our schedules, Lexa and I don't cross paths much. I'm up before her three days of the week and shes up before me two days of the week. When I come into the room she’s usually studying at her desk with her headphones in. We have barely said a word to each other since the first day of us meeting.

Today is try outs for basketball, I wake up early to go for a run to get my nerves out before I go to my classes. The time creeps by and finally its 4pm and I make my way into the gym. Raven’s first day is today as well and I spot her across the gym when I walk in. She shakes her head hard and tries mouthing something to me but I don't know what it is so I ignore her and walk over to the sign up sheet. As i'm signing my name I hear a groan from behind me, I turn and see green eyes piercing my blue eyes.

“You have got to be kidding me.” Lexa scowls and I return the face. “What are you doing here Griffin?”

“What does it look like i'm doing?” I fold my arms over my chest and stare at her.

“The cheerleaders are in the next building over.” She says

“I'm here to play basketball Woods. I'm not a damn cheerleader. Now back off.” I nearly growl. Just because I'm a petite blonde doesn't mean i'm a cheerleader.

“Wow, looks like we have a feisty one here.” A girl who is just as tall or even taller than Lexa approaches us. She offers her hand to me and I shake it. “Anya.”

“Clarke.” She has a firm handshake and dark eyes and ombre hair. 

“Well Clarke nice to have you come try out. I'm captain one and this is captain two. But we usually just call her the Commander. Seems like you two know each other though?” She looks between us.

“She’s my roommate.” Lexa rolls her eyes before walking off. Anya lets out a laugh.

“Oh shit you're the roommate?” She smirks at me.

“I can see shes already had so many nice things to say about me.” I say sarcastically.

“No no its just Lexa hates roommates. Usually they ask to be switched by this time but she said you are more headstrong than most.” I shrug my shoulders as the coach blows the whistle.

“Alright ladies, we are here today to see if you all got what it takes to be on the Grounders basketball team. I'm coach Indra. These two ladies are the captains.” Coach Indra motions towards Anya and Lexa who both stand tall and intimidating. “Anya goes by Captain and Lexa goes by Commander. I trust them enough to let them make most decisions for this team. Now lets get to doing suicides on the first line ladies, come on!” 

There was about 12 of us who showed up to tryouts. We all lined up on the line and start running, hitting one line then back and to the next line and back.

“Come on! I want to see fingers touch the line, not just toes!” Anya yells from the sideline. We hit all the lines and make it back to the first line all of us a little or more out of breath. “Come on, do it again!” We line up and go again. I can feel Lexa watching me which just drives me harder. After doing suicides three times we are allowed to stop.

“Lay up time. Grab a ball and make two lines on either side of the goal.” Lexa says.   
And so we do. Practice goes on for two hours, several girls dropped out or Anya and Lexa told them they are out. There are three of us left and we all drop to the floor after Indra blows her whistle.

“Good job ladies. Welcome to the team.” Indra writes somethings on her board as Raven brings us bottles of water

“You did really great Clarke.” Raven says as I down my entire bottle of water. I wipe my face before answering

“I'm going to kill you Rayes.” I glare at her

“I'm sorry I had no idea she played basketball.” She whispered and I just fell backwards on my back. "I tried warning you when you came in." She tries to defend. but I just flip her off and she laughs a little as she walks away. I Close my eyes and try to steady my breathing for a couple of minutes.

“Looks like you made the team Griffin.” I open my left eye to see Lexa standing over me.

“Seems so Woods.” I stare at her for a moment. 

“This doesn't mean you get any special treatment because we are roommates, got it?” 

“Oh I got it Commander.” I sit up slowly with a huff. “I sure the hell wasn't asking for special treatment from you though.” I stand up and walk to the locker room to take a shower.

 

_________________________________

Lexa and my paths don't cross much except at basketball practices. Even then we don't really talk. She yells at us and tries to kill us with work outs. But that's bout it.  
One night my class got canceled so I was back in our dorm room, sitting on my bed sketching a building from my memory. I hear the key slide into the key slot and I look up to see Lexa. She looks surprised when she sees me, stopping a beat before closing the door behind her.

“What are you doing here Griffen?” She sounds curious and not hostile as she usually does. 

“My class got cancelled.” I watch as she drops her backpack at the end of her bed. Her shoulders are slumped and there are dark circles under her eyes. “I can be here if I want, it is my room as well.” I don't know why I said it, maybe because I wanted to be on the defense first this round.

“It is your room.” She says quietly before falling on her back on the bed with a sigh. I was expecting her to shoot back some snarky remark or something, her quiet demeanor throwing me off. The room is quiet for a few minutes and i cant stop myself from asking.

“Are you okay Lexa?” I ask quietly, testing the water.

“Just peachy.” She drawls. She puts an arm over her face.

“Do you want me to turn off the lights?” I close my sketch book and set it on my desk.

“No its okay, I need to study for a test.” She sighs and gets up slowly and searches through her bag until she finds the book and notebook she wants. She sits back down on her bed, spreading out the book in front of her. Her long brown hair falling down shielding her face from my view. Her hair is wavy today except for a couple small braids here and there.   
The conversation we had just had has been the most friendly one we've ever had and i must say it was refreshing. My phone ringing interrupts my thoughts and i shake my head because I had been staring at Lexa’s. I quickly grab my phone, answering it.

“Hey Sweetheart, how are you?” My moms voice came through the line.

“I'm good Mama, how are you?” I get off of my bed and slip my shoes on before leaving my room and walking down the stairs, waving at a few people I knew before making my way outside and onto a bench.

“I'm good, just staying busy at the hospital. Your father is staying busy at the shop. How are classes?” I could hear her washing dishes in the background and the image brought a smile, thinking back to when we would always talk in the kitchen after dinner while she did dishes.

“They are good. I'm really enjoying them actually.” 

“Thats great to hear Clarke.” I then hear my father enter the kitchen. “Is that my baby girl you're talking too?” Theres some shuffling and then I hear his voice more clearly. “Hey there babygirl. I miss you.” I instantly smile.

“Hey dad, I miss you too.”

“Hows basketball?” He asked excitedly.

“Hard. Our captain and commander are really hard on us.” I say as i pick at the paint on the bench. “But it feels good to be on the court again.”

“I imagine it does. I'm glad to hear your voice but your mother is giving me that look and I think she wants to talk back at you.” He chuckles. “Goodnight, I love you.”

“And I love you.” Dad slips the phone back into moms shoulder and ear.

“Your father has been a handful Clarke, you need to hurry and come home and get him straightened out.” I can hear the smile in her voice. “Hes almost as bad as Raven with some of the ideas and gadgets he brings home. Sometimes I fear for my life.” I laugh as I hear my father in the back ground holler an offended ‘Hey thats not true Clarke, don't listen to her.’ Mom starts laughing after that as well. 

“I miss you guys.” I say honestly. “But hearing you guys laugh sure does make my day brighter.”

“We miss you too sweetheart.” I look at the time and decide its time for me to go back inside.

“I'm gonna go though mom. I love you.”

“I love you too. We will talk soon.” And with that the call ended and I make my way back up to my room to see a very passed out Lexa sprawled across her bed. I don't know what came over me, maybe it was hearing the joy in my parents voices or the calmness I felt from talking with them, but I gently moved Lexa’s books off of her bed, putting a bookmark in the places the books were opened and then layed a blanket on her from the bottom of the bed. I just wanted to be nice, and I know how hard college gets and sometimes we all need someone to do one nice thing for us to keep us going. And Lexa seemed to be at the end of her straw tonight.


	2. Boxing and Basketball.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa is dealing with nightmares which brings her little sleep. Boxing and Basketball helps keep her mind off of the past and keeps her focused on the future.

I woke up with a start. Nightmares flooding my mind as I sit up in bed. I look at the clock and it read 4:56am. I take a deep breath and notice i'm still in my day clothes and I remember falling asleep while studying. But my books were not on my bed anymore, they were on my desk and I also notice a blanket on me that I do not remember grabbing. I then look over at the sleeping blonde across the room. She must have done this...But why? We can barely stand each other. I sigh deeply, running my hands over my face before slipping out of bed to grab my books and my book light so I could continue studying. There’s book marks in each of the places I had been studying. I smile slightly before I begin reading.There was no point in trying to go back to sleep. Sleep was long gone for me after that nightmare. It's happening more and more often as the date comes closer.

__________________________

I make my way out of class with Echo not far behind me.

“Hey Lexa, how did you do on that test?” We weave our way through the crowed and out the side door.

“I think it went pretty good. How about you?” She shrugged her shoulders.

“You know i'm not good at taking tests.” I nod in response. “Anyway, are you coming to the boxing gym?” I nod again and so we walk that way. Once inside we set our stuff down and make our way over to Lincoln who is teaching a newbie some punches.

“Hey Lincoln.” He looks over at us and smiles. Then the newbie he is training looks at us and its that Octavia chick who is Clarke’s friend.

“Octavia this is Echo and…”

“Lexa. Yeah we've met. She’s roommates with my best friend.” She quirks an eyebrow at me. I ignore her and focus back on Lincoln

“On that note, i'm going to go practice on the speed bag.” Echo and I both change in the locker room before going to our separate bags and begin working out. I work on my speed for a while before moving to the punching bag. After an hour or so Lincoln is behind the bag holding it.

“Rough day?” He asks softly.

“Rough night.” I throw a left hook so hard it makes Lincoln take a step. “Nightmares.”

“Have you thought about going and talking to a therapist? At Least for this time of the year. I know they fade after the date is gone but…” I hit the bag two more times, harder than i should and I can feel pain through my wrist. “It might help.” 

“I don't want to talk to anyone Linc. I don't do well with talking. That's why I focus on basketball and boxing because it helps take my mind off of it.” Lincoln nods his head. He knows about everything that's gone on in my life because he’s my cousin. He’s a year older than me and has always tried to protect me. But some things he couldn't protect me from.

“Have you talked to Aden?” The mention of the boy brings both joy and sorrow. I step away from the punching bag

“Yeah. He’s coming for my first game. Gustus agreed to bring him.” I unwrap my hands and take a deep breath.

“It will be good to see the little guy.” I nod my head but need to change the conversation.

“So you trying to get with that girl?” I quirk an eyebrow.

“Her names Octavia.” He sighs. “And she's kinda amazing. I'd love to see if it could go somewhere between us.” He smiled softly.

“Just ask her out.” I shrug. Lincoln is a big muscular attractive guy who has lots of women wanting his attention. He looks like he would use women for one night stands and such but to be honest I don't recall him ever having a one night stand. He respects women. And if he thinks Octavia could make him happy then who am I to disagree?

“I can't just ask her out.” He shuffles his feet. “Like what if she says no? And then practice would be awkward.”

“What if she says yes?” I counter. He shakes his head and smiles a bit. I don't know why i'm encouraging him to ask her out though. She’s one of Clarkes friends and I rather our circles not inter cross more than they already have.

“We will see. Anyway, you go get cleaned up, i'm heading out.” He walked away and I head into the locker room to take a shower and change.  
I go to my next two classes then grab something small to eat before basketball practice. I walk into the gym and spot Anya talking to Raven on the bleachers which I also notice that they are holding hands. I make my way to them and drop a small sack in Anya’s lap.

“Ah Lexa you love me.” Anya laughs as she pulls out a box of french fries which she begins to share with Raven.

“Sometimes.” I sit beside her and start lacing up my shoes.

“All the time.” She nudges me. “So what are we gonna do for practice today?”

“Make them run some laps and then I think we should scrimmage.”

“Sounds like a plan. You on one team, me on the other.” I nod my head. 

“Where is Indra tonight?” Raven asks.

“She usually only comes to a practices every few weeks. She likes us for some reason and lets us take over practices.” Anya shrugs. “Let's go get them ready.” Anya hands the rest of the fries to Raven before squeezing her leg gently. I roll my eyes but follow her down the bleachers.

“Okay start by running five laps!” I holler as the last girl finishes tying up her shoe. As the 10 girls start running past I spot Clarke’s blonde hair go past and something inside me tingles. I don't know if it's a good tingle or bad. “Come on girls pick it up!” Anya and I jump in the running now. And before long the five laps are over and we are picking teams. 

“Okay Lexa, you all are shirts, we are skins.” Anya strips off her shirt showing her red sports bra, the rest of her team following suite. Including Clarke who is sporting a grey Calvin Klein sports bra and I can't help but let my eyes travel down my roommates impressive body. I hear Anya chuckle beside me.

“What?” I can feel a blush traveling up my neck.

“Stop checking out your hot roommate and get on the court.”

“I'm not checking her out.” I growl as I make my way to the court. Anya and I are both jumping for the ball first. She might be taller than me, but I can jump higher and so i tip the ball over to Emori who snatches it and dribbles down the court passing it to one of the other girls who shoots the ball and gets us a point. We all shuffle back down the court and Anya passes the ball to Clarke who comes straight at me. I plant my feet and make an X with my arms over my chest and wait for the impact of Clarke’s body colliding with me. My tailbone hits the ground hard and I wince but stop myself from sliding any more.

“What the hell Woods! Foul!” Clarke yells.

“Sure is a foul.” I stand up and brush my hands on my shorts. “A foul on you.” Her mouth falls open.

“No way! You fouled me.” She looked pissed which made me smirk.

“Ladies ladies.” Anya steps in between us. “As much as I hate to agree with Lexa, it is a foul on you. Her feet were firmly planted which means you fouled her.” Clarke clenched her jaw and forcefully threw the ball into my chest which I caught. “We need to learn screening or setting a pick as some of you know it by. We will go over that next practice, yeah?” Everyone nods and I hand the ball to one of the girls so she can check it in to me. I dribble down the court and take a step back behind the three point line and get nothing but net. Five for us, zero for them.

The game goes on for awhile and the score is now 25 us and 23 them. Clarke is coming down with the ball again and she tricks out Emori and comes around towards me, I get up close on her and she shoves her forearm into my chest pushing me away before she jumps and I hear a swoosh behind me. She smirks at me as she runs backwards.   
I notice the time on the wall and we are already seven minutes past time.

“Anya, wanna call it game? We are already over our time.” She looks at the board and nods before she whistles with her fingers motioning everyone to come in. “Okay that is game. You guys did great.” I say as I look at each of their faces. Everyone's sweaty and breathing hard.

“What, are we not gonna see who wins? Its tied. Or are you just a sore loser Commander?” Clarke says. And I narrow my eyes at the challenge in her voice.

“We are already going over practice time Griffen.” She rolls her eyes.

“Anyway," Anya cuts in. "our first game is this weekend so I expect you all to be here early and ready to kick some ass. To answer your earlier question Clarke, Lexa and I are both sore losers. As you all should be too. We don't lose.” Anya says firmly and everyone nods before we dismiss them.

“Good game Captain.” I clap her on the back and she grins.

“Right back at ya. Now let's go get a drink.” She starts walking towards the locker room and i'm right behind her.

“No drinks for me tonight. I'm gonna go home and study.”

“That's all you ever do.” She she shakes her head.

“I have to Anya. I gotta graduate this year if I want to get custody of Aden.” I say quietly and she squeezes my shoulder as her face softens.

“You're going to get custody of him Lex. Everything is going to be okay.” I nod and strip out of my clothes before jumping in the shower.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Im going to try and alternate between Clarke's view and Lexa's view. I hope I can portray them correctly so you all can enjoy them!


	3. Bruises and drunken confession.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Grounders have their first game! They win but not with out a little bruising. Clarke meets little Aden and later confesses to Lexa that she thinks she's attractive.

It was game day. First game of the season and first game I've played in nearly five years. To say i was nervous would be an understatement. I was pacing in the locker room trying to calm my nerves when I hear a low voice behind me.

“Nervous Griffin?” Lexa was leaning against the lockers looking at me.

“So what if I am Woods?” I narrow my eyes.

“Nothing wrong with being nervous. Just don't throw up on the court.” She smirks and I scowl.

“Ill be fine.” I sit down on the bench and I try to keep my leg from bouncing. “It's just been awhile since ive played an actual game.” I mumble.

“Why’s that?” 

“Something...happened and I wasn't able to finish out in high school.” There was no way I was going to tell her about my cancer. I didn't need pity. I was done with people pitying me and treating me differently than they usually would.

“Well there’s no time like now to start again. Come on Griffin let's hit the court.” She motioned behind her and I follow her out of the locker room. The noise of the crowd growing with every step. The crowd was never this big in high school. But college spirit grew more every year that the Grounder won. We make it to our bench where most of the team is except for a couple still in the locker room.

“Aye Commander. Clarke.” Anya claps us both on the back. “Ready to kick some ass? You are both in first.” She turns and looks at the rest of the girls. “Emori, Jess, and Brit, you guys are on the court first too.” They all nod.

“Okay girls, are you all ready to win?” Indra looks at everyone individually in the eye. “Because that's why we are here. We are taking the championship medal for the 6th year in a row and it starts tonight. Teamwork is key. I don't want any bullshit out on the court tonight, no drama, nothing but teamwork and trust. Understood?” Everyone nods their heads as she puts her hand in the middle and we all follow suit and do the same “One...Two...Three..”

“GROUNDERS!!” The team shouts and the ref blows his whistle as we make our way onto the court. Lexa is our jumper and i'm behind her on the right for defense. Lexa and the other girl jumper shake hands and then get in a stance ready to jump when the ref blows his whistle and the ball goes up. Lexa jumps a good bit higher than the other girl, tipping it off to Emori who takes it down the court and passes it to Jess who takes the shot and gets it in with ease. The crowd cheers as we make our way back down the court. I give her a high five and she smiles widely. She’s one of the new girls and to be the first to get a point for the season is a big deal.

The game goes on and we are pummeling the other team. After half time the other team is more angry and so they are being more reckless and fouling more. One girl who i'm guarding jabs me hard in the ribs for nearly the hundredth time this game it seems. 

“Back off.” I hiss at her. But she just smirks and when the ball is in the air going towards the net where everyone is focused she jabs me with her elbow again in the same place even harder. Knocking the breath out of me. I can't help myself from reacting so I shove her hard and she falls on the ground dramatically. The ref blows his whistle and calls a foul. I try to defend myself but the ref just tells me off. Lexa looks pissed and tells me to get off the court and get a sub. I bite my tongue from saying something back. The girl gets to take two free throws and gets them both in.

“What the hell was that Griffin?” Anya asks as she throws me a water.

“She kept jabbing me in the ribs and I got tired of it.” I seethe and sit on the bench. The anger just growing inside me.

“That's Nia for ya, she's a real bitch.” Anya focuses back on the game and Indra doesn't say a word to me but did give me a pointed look.

“You are doing great Clarke.” Raven kneels beside me. “Do you want me to get an ice pack for your ribs?” I shake my head no.

I sit the rest of the game out with much argument. We win of course and everyone is excited, the crowd goes crazy! But i'm still pissed at Nia and Lexa is still pissed at me. We all make our way into the locker room to get cleaned up. I was sitting on the bench untying my shoes when Lexa stands in front of me

“You need to learn to control your damn anger on the court Griffin.” Lexa folds her arms over her chest and stares me down.

“She needs to learn how to control her elbows. She had been elbowing me all game, and yeah so what if I lost it! You would have too.” I nearly spit as I stand up in front of her gaining my own defensive stance. 

“It's part of the game! I get you've been off the court for a long time but you don't remember how this works? Elbows are always thrown in basketball!” Her voice raises and the anger inside me does too.

“I fucking know how basketball works! But this,” I lift my shirt showing the huge black and blue bruise forming on my ribs. “Is not part of the game!” Lexa’s eyebrows shoot up to her hairline as she eyes my bruise.

“Shit Clarke…” Anya comes over and looks at it more closely. “You need some ice on that.”

“I'm fine.” I grit my teeth as her hand runs over it and I stare at Lexa and push my shirt back down.

“Okay ladies break it up!” Indra steps in the room. “There will be no more arguing tonight. What happened on the court stays on the court. Tonight we won and that's all that matters.”

“In other words, let's party!” Raven says and everyone agrees happily.

________________________________

After everyone was showered and dressed up for the club everyone headed. I had to go back to my dorm room to grab my wallet. As I approach my dorm room I see a young boy who must be eight or nine years old sitting outside my door with a gameboy in hand. I hear voices inside, a man's voice particularly.

“Lexa you have to graduate to show the court that you can take care of him.”

“What do you think i'm doing Gustus? That's all i'm focusing on right now. Graduating and putting enough money aside for Aden and I to move in together.”

I squat down to talk to the boy. But clench my teeth at the pain in my ribs

“Hey, what's your name?” I ask softly with a smile. Dark brown eyes look back at mine

“Aden. What's yours?” He smiles.

“Nice to meet you Aden, I'm Clarke. Whatcha playing there?” His grin grows as he begins to tell me about his game. I try to focus on what he’s saying but the voices inside keep grabbing my attention.

“Do not make any promises you will not keep Alexandria. This boy does not need to be disappointed again, especially by you.” The gruff voice says inside.

“I'm doing everything in my power to get custody. Don't you dare try and make me into the bad guy right now. Those days are over, the bad guy is the court system now.”

“Whats going on in there Aden?” I ask him quietly.

“Gustus and Lexa are fighting again...As usual.” He shrugs and i'm about to ask him another question when the door swings open and Lexa is staring down at me with knitted brows and question in her eyes.

“Uh...Hi?” I say awkwardly as I stand back up and step back to let a big burly man with a long beard step out of the room.

“Come Aden it is time to leave.” Aden pockets his game boy.

“Gustus...Just a couple more minutes with him please?” Lexa asks with pleading eyes.

“I'll be waiting at the end of the hall.” He starts walking that way. “Five minutes Aden.”

Lexa steps out of the way of the door to let me by. I walk past to give her to give them some privacy. I make myself busy in the room but can still hear Lexa’s calm voice talking to Aden because the door is wide open.

“I'm glad you were able to come tonight buddy.”

“I am too. You did really good! That three pointer was nothing but net Lex!” Aden said excitedly.

“Thank you buddy.” Lexa laughs gently. “It's going to be a few more weeks until I will be able to see you again. I'm trying to get something settled so we can spend more time together. I have to get this school done with and get some more money before we can start our life together. You understand that right?”

“I do Lexa, don't worry about me, i'm okay waiting for you.” I look over my shoulder and see Lexa crouched down and Aden hugging her tightly around the neck.

“I'll always worry about you buddy.” She says gently. “Are you doing well in school?” 

“I am. Teacher says i'm smart like my mom was.” Lexa chuckles but soon stops when Gustus hollers for Aden. 

“When we are together again I have to tell you all about the new game I got for my gameboy!” 

“Sounds like a plan buddy.” I watch as she pulls him into a hug. “I love you.” She says quietly.

“I love you too Lex.” He pulls back and walks down the hall. Lexa stands and watches him go. I watch Lexa until she must have felt me watching her because she turns to look at me. I look away quickly and busy myself trying not to look like I was eavesdropping. 

“How much did you hear?” Lexa comes in the room.

“Um...Enough?” She nods her head and stuffs her hands farther into her pockets on her loose jeans. “So he is your…?” I didn't know if he was her brother or son or what.

“It's complicated.” She mumbles and looks down at her shoes.

“He seems sweet.” A small smile appears on Lexa’s lips.

“He is. He’s a good kid.”

“So what happened?” I ask quietly and regret it almost instantly as I see Lexa’s body stiffen and her mask falls back into place over her face.

“Aren't you suppose to be out celebrating with the rest of the team?” She looks at me with hard eyes.

“Yes, I just needed to grab something before heading out.” I grab my wallet and slip it into my pocket. “Are you coming?”

“Not really in the partying mood.” she made her way to her desk.

“Right….Well i'll see you later then.” I slip out the door taking one last look at Lexa’s sagging shoulders.

I call my parents on the way to the club. The phone rings two times before my dad answers it.

“Hey baby! We watched the game online! You did great! But what happened with that girl that got you thrown outta the game? I was not very happy that they kept you out. If I need to come down there and have a talk with some people-”

“Hello to you too dad.” I laugh at his defensive nature. “Everything is fine. She was just elbowing me a lot. Left a nasty bruise on my ribs.”

“Oh in that case then.” My mom's voice now comes through the phone. “ I am coming down there and having a talk with some jerk face girl.”

“You guys, I am fine!” I chuckle. “We won and that's all that matters. I'm going to celebrate now.”

“That sounds wonderful sweetie and we won't keep you long but I did want to remind you about your doctor appointment in a couple weeks. It's the second to last one sweetheart.” Mom sounds relieved and so am I.

“Yes ma’am. I'll be there don't worry. I love you guys.”

“We love you too.”  
_________________________

I make my way into the club where most of my team is partying. The music is loud and the lights are flashing and the booze are flowing.

“Clarkeeee!” Raven grabs my shoulders. “You're hereee!”

“And you are drunk.” I can smell the alcohol on her breath.

“Only a little bit.” She puts her thumb and pointer finger only about an inch apart. “Come on everyone's over here at the table!” Raven drags me to the table where she nearly lands on Anya’s lap. I raise my eyebrow at Anya who puts her arm around Raven shoulder to steady her.

“I'll take care of her, don't worry.” Anya answers my unasked question. “She’s just a little drunk. Here, try to catch up.” She slides me over a glass with pink liquid in it and winks. It tastes like strawberries.  
Soon i'm out on the dance floor dancing with my teammates and the fourth or fifth drink in my hand. I can feel the alcohol and the music coursing through me and it feels good. Hands on hips, bodies moving in rhythm with one another and alcohol blurring out everything else.

I stumble into my room some hours later. I try to be quiet to not wake up the dragon of a roommate. But of course i'm not that lucky.

“You are so drunk aren't you Clarke?” Lexa sighs as I trip over something in the dark room.

“Shhhh you are sleeeeping.” 

“No i'm definitely not.” Lexa flips on the light by her bed. The sudden light bringing an instant headache behind my eyes.

“Damn it Lexaaaa.” I groan and cover my face with my hands.

“How much did you have to drink?” She asks cautiously and I feel her hand on my arm leading me to bed.

“Farrr too muchhh.” I sit on the bed and pull off my shoes and squint up at Lexa. She’s in a white tank top and basketball shorts with a messy bun atop her head and she looks hot. And i'm too drunk to know how to keep my mouth shut. “You look hot Lexa.” Even in my drunken state I can see a blush forming on her neck.

“You are drunk Clarke.” She goes to the mini fridge and pulls out a bottle of water and gets me to take a drink.

“Drunk or not, you're still hotttt.” I smirk at her and she just shakes her head. “But i'm like heat hot...my goodness it's like a furnace in hereeee.” I whine and stand up to undo my pants and slip them off my legs and then take my shirt off. Lexa’s eyes widen.

“Clarke.” She breathes. “What are you doing?”

“I'm trying to not die from the heatttt.”

“Just do not take off anymore clothes.” She shakes her head and looks at me firmly.

“I like when you say my name.” I sigh and fall back into my bed.

“What?” she furrows her brow.

“You always call me Griffen and it always sounds so hateful.” I yawn. 

“Well...I don't know.” She mumbles.

“Don't worry bout it, I get you don't care for me Lex.” The nick-name slips out. My eyes are too blurry to keep open anymore.

“Thats untrue.” She says just above a whisper and I feel a blanket being laid across my legs and waist. “Does it hurt?” I feel her fingertips on my ribs.

“It did. But by the fourth drink in I couldn't feel it anymore.” I giggle. 

“Go to sleep Clarke.” She pulls the blanket further up my body before going back to her bed.

“Seeee? It sounds so nice coming from your lips.” I fall asleep with a smile on my lips and unbeknownst to me, so does Lexa.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all enjoyed this chapter! If so leave a comment! They are so encouraging and help me keep going.


	4. Dancing and Battleship

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa goes to a house party at Lincolns and then goes clubbing with Clarke. Nightmares lead to battleship and deep conversation.

I am sitting at my desk finishing up homework when there is a rapid knock on my door and Anya’s muffled voice.

“Aye yo Lex let me in.” I chuckle and open the door. “Come on, we are having a little get together at Lincolns apartment.”

“A little get together or a party?” I'm skeptical when Anya invites me to things because they are usually far more than what she says they are. For instance once she told me we were going to a dance club and...It turned out to be a male strip club. Yes it was dancing but not the kind I was expecting. She enjoys holding back information from me and watching me become uncomfortable..

“A little get together honestly! Please Lex? We can kick some ass on Call of Duty.” 

“Oh alright.” I sigh and grab my Diamond snapback and slip it on backwards before following her over to Lincolns dorm room in the building across campus. Once inside Lincoln shoves mixed drinks into our hands and ushers us into the living room where food is laid out on the table and a few of his friends are already playing COD. 

“I call next round.” I sit down on the couch and watch as Nyko gets sniped. I can't help but chuckle at his frustration. I grab some chips and salsa and snack before it's my turn to play. Soon I have the controller in my hand and the game has started. Its about half way done and i've only died twice and have fifteen kills. Not bad at all for my first game in ages.

“Hey you all made it!” hear the door and look over to see Raven, Octavia and Clarke make their way through the door. I'm staring and I know I am but I just wasn't expecting Clarke to be here tonight and the dress she is wearing is revealing a little more than i'm used too and its down right hot. Clarke locks eyes with mine.

“Bruh, focus! You've just been head shotted.” I shake my head and focus back on the game. Soon I feel a presence beside me and look up to see Clarke watching the TV.

“Why am I not surprised that you're good at video games.” The game ends and my final score is twenty two and three.

“Are you good at video games Clarke?” I hold the controller up to her. She looks down at me, blue connecting with green. We hadn't spoken much since the drunken night I helped her into bed. The night that she admitted that she liked when I called her Clarke. And that she thought I was attractive. I bite my lip remembering that night. She takes the controller from my hand and I scoot over on the couch to make room for her to sit.

“Can I switch the mode? I kinda wanna play all or nothing.” She asks.

“Do as you like.” I take a drink of my beverage and watch the match play out. Clarke is good with her throwing knife. She bumped up the sensitivity to let her turn quicker and throw faster. She comes out on top with 4 deaths and 20 kills. I chuckle at the look on Nyko’s face.

“Shit dude, that was killer.” He high fives her and she hands him the controller. I watch her stand up and walk into the kitchen to grab a drink. Clarke intrigues me. She’s different from most girls.

“Lexa! Come over here and do shots with us!” Raven calls from the kitchen. I do as she says and stand beside her and Lincoln. There are several shots lined up. “Okay we have a blue kamikaze, a snake bite and my personal favorite...a slippery nipple.” She smirks as she pushing the shots towards each of us. Anya, Clarke, Octavia and Me. Lincoln just stands and watches.

“You not gonna get in on this action?” I ask him and he just laughs and shakes his head.

“I've had Ravens shots before, she does something to them.” I look at her questioningly.

“Oh he doesn't know what he’s talking about. Lincoln you big baby.” Raven rolls her eyes and picks up the blue kamikaze first. “Bottoms up!” We all follow suit and tap the table with the glass before tipping it back. The liquor burns but it has a good taste. The snake bite is much worse. I cough and give her a dirty look.

“Told ya!” Lincoln laughs but everything's better after I get the slippery nipple down. Clarke is smiling at me and I feel a tug on my own lips.

“What?” I ask her.

“Maybe you don't have a stick shoved up your butt after all.” Her eyes glistened playfully and I just shake my head as everyone laughs.

“Lexa can be a partier when she wants too.” Anya says with a smirk.

“Oh don't you dare.” I nearly growls as I see the mischief bubble up in her eyes. I know she's going to talk about my high school days when I drank more than I slept. Back then I was the party animal. Hell, I invented some of the party traditions that are still going on back in our home town.

“Oh i'm so curious right now!” Raven says. “Look at how she is fidgeting with her cup! And my lord look at that scowl she's giving you Anya.” Raven nudges her excitedly. “Go on pleaseeee.”

“Well...Her name back in high school was-” I set my drink down and Anya takes a step back “-Heda because she ruled all the parties with her badass vibes and good dance moves!” I growl and move forward as Anya runs and i'm not far behind her. “She used to dance on the tables and everything!” She goes around the couch to try and get into Lincoln's room but I intercept her by jumping over the couch and tackle her. “Possible pole’s involved!”

“You are so dead!” I begin tickling her and her squeals of laughter bring everyone over to see the damages i'm doing to her. After a couple minutes I stop my assault. “If we were any smaller I would give you a swirly.” I grumble as I help her up.

“Good thing i'm taller than you then.” She winks and I punch her arm hard. 

“What's a swirly?” Clarke questions. Everyone looks at her like she's lost her mind.

“You don't have older siblings do you Clarke?” Anya asks and Clarke shakes her head slowly.

“Wanna find out what a swirly is?” I smirk and take a step closer to her. Her eyes widen and she jumps behind Octavia. “Do you honestly think Octavia won't help me give you your first swirly Clarke?” I quirk my eyebrow at Octavia and she just grins. Clarke sees what's going on so she moves behind Lincoln next.

“Lincoln, you'll save me right?” She looks at him desperately, grabbing his arm as Octavia and I take a step closer to her.

“Uhh…” He looks at Octavia. But Clarke pulls him down so she could whisper in his ear. His face slowly becomes red.

“Right, okay you got it.” He widens his arms so we can't get around him before looking at Octavia who just rolls her eyes as Clarke smirks and everyone laughs hard. The night goes on and more alcohol is of course involved until someone suggests we go to a club. We all pile into Nyko’s truck because he’s the only one who hadn't been drinking. The club isn't far from the school but being in a truck made for five people and instead have seven, everyone gets real comfortable with each other. Clarke is sitting on my lap and I can feel her giggle vibrate through my whole body. Her perfume tickling my nose in a wonderful way. We hit a bump and I automatically put my arms around her waist to keep her from flying. I begin to remove my hands but she gently squeezes them showing that she wants them to stay. She turns her head and smiles widely and I can't help but smile back.

We had been in the club for maybe thirty minutes. I was in the booth talking with Lincoln and Nyko while everyone else was out on the dance floor dancing. Clarke slides into the booth beside me, her hand grabbing mine.

“Come on come dance with meee!”

“I uh..don't dance.” I state lamely.

“Bullshit Heda.” She grins and pulls me out of the booth.

“Ugh fine.” We make it out to the floor. “Just try to keep up.” I whisper in her ear. And smirk at her visible shiver. My body begins to move with the music. Clarke’s back is turned to mine and she begins to sway her hips with the rhythm of mine. As the songs flow from one to another our bodies gravitate closer and closer. I let the alcohol take over my better judgment and grip her hips with my hands and grind her ass into my core. After a bit of dancing that way she turns to face me and we are still grinding and my hands are still on her hips and now her arms around my shoulder. 

“Am I keeping up with you enough?” She whispers in my ear and I bite my lip hard, trying not to show that her hot breath against my ear has an effect on me.

“Yeah you're not too bad.” I wink. After that song ends we find ourselves back at the table with our friends and another round of drinks.

It was one hell of a night.   
_____________________

I sit up straight in my bed, breathing hard and throw the confining covers off my body as the images of blood slowly fades away. I rub my hands over my face trying to wipe the tears and sweat away.

“Are you okay?” A small voice from the other side of the room asks.

“Fine...I'm just fine.” I croak and grab my sweatpants from the floor and slip them on. I open the mini fridge at the end of my bed, the cool air rushing out across my skin. I take a long drink of my bottled water I grabbed.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Clarke’s voice still sounds small. Small and careful.

“Rather not.” I sit back on my bed and hold out my shaking hand, watching it in the stream of light from the street lamp outside. I hear movement from Clarke’s side of the room and before I know it, soft cool hands are gently taking my clammy shaky ones. I don't know why I let her, but then again I do. Because deep down I need human contact in the state of mind i'm in. And being in this dark room whispering quiet words makes it seem like nothing is real and this between us is just secret moments that we will not speak of once the sun rises. I feel safe in that thought, not having to worry that she will bring up that I am weak once the sun breaks the morning darkness.

“Want to play battleship?” She is squatting down in front of me so she can look up into my face. She gently places her lips on the back of my hand and goosebumps rise up my arms.

“What? Battle ship at four in the morning?”

“Yes. It's a good game to play when you hope for other things to get off your mind. What do you say?” I nod my head and she slips her hand from mine and I miss the contact almost immediately. She turns on a small lamp and grabs a box from under her bed. She comes and sits on my bed pulling out the pieces.

“Why do you have battleship under your bed?” I turn to face her, crossing my legs indian style and begin to set up my board.

“It's sorta important to me.” I wait for her to continue but when she doesn't I look up at her and her gaze seems far away. “Lets just say I spent a lot of time in the hospital. This game got me through a lot of rough times.” Her eyes lock with mine and I can see distant pain and heartache. I nod my head and focus back on my board.

“A4?” I ask once we are both finished setting up

“Miss. G3?”

“Nada.” I move a white pin to that spot. The game goes on for awhile, ending with Clarke winning. We are in the middle of the second when I surprise myself and tell Clark about why I have nightmares. “I lost someone three years ago today.” Her hand stops mid way to her board and she looks up at me but I keep my eyes on my board. “Its why I have nightmares.”

“Who was it?” She nearly whispers.

“Her name was Costia. She was my girlfriend but it was moving more towards engagement. She got in a bad car crash. We both did. She was driving and another car lost control and was going far too fast and hit our car. We rolled three times. The car had hit her side.” I take a deep breath, remembering back to that night seeing the blood rushing from her head. “I got out of my seat belt and crawled over to her, the car was upside down at this point. And I knew that her neck was broken because her arms were paralyzed.” 

“Did she make it to the hospital?” I shake my head.

“No. There was too much blood. Blood stained my hands for days after the crash.” The memories of me scrubbing my hands raw make my stomach churn. “But she asked me to promise to do one thing for her before she passed. I swore to her I would.”

“What was the promise?” I look up at her, studying her hard. Her blonde messy hair cascading over her shoulders. Her bright pink tank top and black shorts barely covering enough of her tan skin. Her blue eyes studying me gently.

“It doesn't matter because I haven't been able to fulfill that promise for her yet.” I look out the window and see the pastel colors of the sunrise beginning to show. I close the battleship board softly. “I need to go for a walk.” I stand up and slip on my Vans shoes and open the door. I turn and face her one more time. “Thank you Clarke.”

“Of course Lexa.” We stare at each other for a beat before I close the door and walk down the hall, hands in my pockets and and a billion things on my brain. I walk for an hour or so before I find myself in front of Lincoln's dorm room. I knock hard enough so someone could hear me from one of the rooms.

“Do you have any idea what time it-” Lincoln opens the door with dreary eyes but stops mid sentence when he sees me. His features soften. “Hey sweet girl.” He pulls me into a hug and I let out a sob I had been holding in for far too long.

“I miss her Lincoln, I miss her so much.” I sob into his chest as he closes the door behind us and whispers sweet calming things into my ear as I clutch onto his shirt and try to breath.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well I hope you all enjoy seeing this part of Lexa. She cant always be so strong. But I hope you also enjoyed the fluff before hand!


	5. This Cant Be Happening

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke gets a call that could turn her life upside down....again.

Its been a couple weeks since I woke up to Lexa’s gasping and strangled voice. I didn't know if by saying something she would bite my head off or if she would appreciate it. I'm glad I did though, learning about this mysterious roommate of mine was very enlightening. She fascinates me with her bad ass mood and her intense green eyes and deep stern voice that can turn soft and calming when she wants it too. She’s beautiful honestly. Even in the dark when I know there are tear streaks staining her face and a shake in her body that she can not control.

“Clarke!” Octavia breaks my train of thought. “Good grief what has got you day dreaming so hard?” O questions with a chuckle. “I called your name several times.”

“Sorry. I was just thinking about my school project.” I mumble and begin sketching again. Octavia and I are sitting outside under one of the big tree’s on campus. I'm sketching for a project and she's reading some chapters she needed to finish. Its a beautiful warm day.

“Yeah sure whatever.” She snorts. I'm almost done with the Gothic cathedral when Raven flops on the ground beside us, laying her head on Octavia's lap and her feet in mine. 

“What the heck Raven, get your feet off me!” I shove her feet and they land on the ground beside me.

“What's up bitches?” Her voice is light and happy.

“Clarke is day dreaming about someone and I'm trying to study.” Octavia says nonchalantly.

“Am not!” I gape.

“Who ya daydreaming about?” Raven smirks. “Wouldn't happen to be a tall tan green eyed roommate of yours, would it?”

“Wha-what? Are you crazy?” I sputter.

“No i'm not crazy, you're the crazy one for having heart eyes for your dragon of a roommate.” Raven scoffs.

“You're crazy.” I mumble and focus back on my sketch.

“You did good on your game last night by the way.” Octavia said.

“Thanks O, It was a fun game. Challenging since it was so close in score.” The game brought the team closer together. Lots and lots of passing during the game. Nobody took un-cautious shots. Teamwork was on point last night.

“So I have something to tell you both.” Raven grins.

“Oh my word did you get asked out by Anya?” Octavia’s mouth drops open.

“Damn straight! Well...Not straight. Nowhere near being straight...Because we are both GAY AS HELL! But damn right she and I are going on our first official date!” Raven looks smug.

“Good going Reyes!” I high five her.

“Thank ya Griffen. I'm so excited, but what will I wear?”

“When is the date?” Octavia closes her book.

“Next weekend.” 

“We have plenty of time to decide what you will wear.” We talk about various things including school food and how Lincoln is more of a gentleman than anyone expected him to be.

“Clarke, didn't you have a doctors appointment today?” Raven ask’s

“Yeah I did this morning. They seemed chill about it and said they would call me if need be.” I shrug. It was my second to last Doctor visit until i'm officially considered cancer free. It will be good to not have that hanging over my head anymore.

“Sounds like a plan.” 

 

We all decided to go and eat at a Mexican food restaurant. Lincoln came in later and slid into the booth with Octavia who brightened at his presences almost instantly. 

“So how are boxing lessons going?” I ask the two sitting across from me.

“Well i'm having fun, but you'd have to ask him how i'm actually doing.” a small smile appears on her lips.

“She’s doing great! A complete natural honestly.” He grins at her and I can tell by the look Octavia is giving him that she is falling hard and fast. “She will be able to get into a real match this month I think.”

“Yeah! Bust some skulls in.” Raven fist pumps.

“Lets avoid bashing skulls please. Its sorta against the rules.” Lincoln winks at Raven who just rolls her eyes. I laugh as feel my phone vibrating in my pocket. I see it's a local call so I answer it.

“Hello?”

“Yes, is this Ms. Clarke Griffin?”

“Yes it is.” I stick my finger in my other ear to block out my friends conversations.

“Hi there, this is Nurse Brown.” I stand up from the booth and walk to a more quiet area of the restaurant. “I'm calling to ask you to come back in today and discuss something that came up in your lab results.” My stomach drops and everything around me fades away. Something in my lab results? Could this really be happening again? When I am so close to being over it all? “Ms. Griffin are you still there?” Nurse Brown’s voice brings me out of my thoughts.

“Uh yes yes I'm here. When do you want me to come?” My throat is dry.

“Be here by six thirty?”

“No problem.”

“See you shorty.” The line goes dead and I'm stuck in one spot staring at my phone. This could not be happening. I look up to see my friends all laughing and enjoying themselves and I cant bring myself to tell them or ask them to come with me. No, I need Wells. I make my way back to the table and put on a fake smile.

“Everything okay?” O asks.

“Yeah I have to go meet up with Wells. He asked to see me since its been so long.” I lie outright. 

“Not a problem, I'll cover your meal, you go on and go.” Raven says.

“Thanks babe. I enjoyed lunch. Ill catch you later.” I wave and make my way out of the restaurant and immediately calls Wells.

“Well hello stranger, long time no talk.” Wells deep voice speaks from the other line.

“Wells, I need you.” My voice breaks.

“What's wrong?” His voice becomes serious.

“I went in for testing this morning and-” I cant breath as I wipe a tear that escapes from my eye. “-and they need me to come back in and discuss something that showed up.”

“Alright honey ill be right there, give me thirty minutes.” Wells doesn't live far from campus, he goes to a medical school just down the road. He and I have known each other since I started Chemo. He had his own type of cancer. We were cancer buddies. He had gotten rid of his sooner than I did but he still came back to the hospital every other day to be with me.

I walk the campus passing the Science building, Art building and the cafeteria. I walk through my dorm halls, keeping my head down to avoid conversation with anyone. I open my door and pray that Lexa isn't home yet. The room is dark and her bed is made and i'm safe for a couple minutes in my dark room. I close the door and lean back against it. My eyes close as I try to steady my breathing. I don't know how long i'm leaning against that door but when a knock rings out on the other side it makes me jump. I open the door and see Wells, standing tall and looking sweet as ever.

“Hi.” My voice is small and he wraps me in a hug instantly.

“Don't worry yet, we will go and see whats going on okay? It could be nothing.” He try's reassuring me.

“But it could be something. It could be cancer again Wells.” The tears start falling again and he gently grabs my face, making me look up at him while he leans down. The pads of his thumb wipe's away the tears on my cheeks.

“If it is cancer then you will defeat it again Clarke. You are strong and nothing is gonna stop you from living. Not even this, okay?” His big brown eyes are searching mine and I nod slightly. That's when I hear the turn of the knob on the door as Lexa walks into the room and i notice her surprised expression when she spots Wells holding my face. I take a step back and wipe my eyes and put back on my fake smile.

“Wells, this is Lexa my roommate. Lexa this is Wells my long time friend.” 

“Hey nice to meet you.” Well holds his hand out but Lexa doesn't take it and it feel all too familiar to the first time I met Lexa.

“Hey.” She puts her bag down on the bed and busies herself. 

“Are you ready to go?” He asks me quietly. The thing with Lexa didn't seem to faze him. He and I both had more important and scary things on our minds….My lab results. 

“Yeah okay.” My stomach drops as I walk towards the door. “I'll see you later Lexa.” I see something cross over her eyes as she looks between Wells and I...Jealously possibly? 

“Don't forget our early game Griffin.” Ouch. It's been awhile since she’s called me that. 

“Right.” I nod my head and close the door behind me. 

“So that's your roommate. Do you get along with her?” We walk through the halls and down to his car.

“At first we pretty much hated each other. But recently we have been getting along fine.” I slide into the passenger seat and soon we are on our way in a quiet car to the hospital to find out the results that could change my life...Again.

 

____________________________

We had been sitting in the waiting room for over a half an hour by the time they called my name. I was gripping Wells hand the entire time we had been here. He talked about things that had been going on in his life and funny stories to try and keep my mind off the present.

“Ms. Griffin?” Wells and I stand up and walk towards the front desk. “You can follow nurse Daisy to your room.” We nod and follow the small plump nurse to a room down the hall.

“Dr. Cooper will be here shortly.” I sit on the table/chair as Wells stands beside me, rubbing circles on the back of my hand. The door opens.

“Hello, i'm Dr Cooper, Ms. Griffin. And...Mr Griffin?” He questions.

“No, we are not married. We are just close friends. I'm Wells Jaha.” He shakes the doctors hand. 

“So we called you in here to talk about your lab results.” He pulls up a chair and sits in front of me as he flips through my file. “I see you have had previous encounter with Cancer.” He states and I nod as my stomach churns. “Well Ms. Griffin I need to inform you that you have renal cell carcinoma.” Wells hand squeezes mine.

“Which is what?” My voice is just above a whisper.

“Its a form of cancer in your kidney that grows and becomes a tumor that cannot be controlled.” My stomach drops and I feel like i might pass out.

“So I have cancer again?” The tears begin to fog my vision.

“I'm so sorry to inform you, but yes Ms. Griffin, you have cancer again.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeahhhh so that happened... 0.0


	6. Raven has a killer left hook.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa is in a bad mood and Raven has a killer left hook.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As promised here is the next chapter! Sorry its short. And thank you all for staying with me, we will all get through this together!

Clarke didn't come home last night. Seeing her with that guy sparked something inside me. And knowing that she spent the night with him made this spark burn even hotter. That spark would be called jealousy. Yes, I am falling for my roommate. The frustration that came with realizing this had already put me in a sour mood for the day. When I woke up and saw Clarke’s bed still unoccupied, I had to go for a run to clear my mind and try to clear my bad mood. I ran until I almost threw up. 

 

Our basketball game started in thirty minutes, I just finished lacing my shoes up in the locker room. I counted the girls and everyone was there....Except Clarke. I look at the clock on the wall that reads 8:33.

“Okay girls listen up.” Indra calls and the whole locker room becomes quiet. “Today isn't going to be easy. We have won every game so far and so has this team. This will break the streak for our team or theirs.” She looks at each of the girls. “And let's make sure its their streak that's broken.” Some of the girls holler in agreement. “Now finish up getting ready and let's get out there and start stretching.” With that she walks out the door and several of us follow. We are find a corner and begin our stretches.

“Where’s Clarke?” Anya asks me and I shrug.

“She better be here.” I grumble and switch to stretching my other leg. I look around and notice Raven isn't here either which I find weird.

By the time we are done stretching, I look at the clock on the wall that read 8:55. I nearly growl in irritation that she isn't here. She knew this was an important game. But no, she’s out sleeping with her ‘long time friend.’  
The ref blows his whistle and we make our way onto the court. I'm jumper as always. I tap the ball sending it to Sarah who passes it to Anya who’s already at the goal awaiting the chance to do a lay up. It successfully goes in.  
We go back down the court setting up our defense. I'm taller so i'm a forward in the back. I jump, trying to block one of the shots but am unsuccessful.  
As the game goes on and the fowl mood I've been holding in slowly starts to flow out. I lash out. I have three fouls by halftime. They are ahead by several points. I steal the ball and am dribbling down the court. Anya is already at the goal.

“Pass the ball to Anya!” Anya is open but I'm determined to get a point of my own this game. I go for a layup and a girl from the other team stands like a brick wall and I'm half way in the air when I hit her and my shot doesn't go in. I fall down on my back, the other team already running the ball down the court. 

“What the hell was that?” Anya is standing over me with a scowl. “I was wide open!”

“Whatever.” I get off the floor and run back down the court. I'm guarding one of the girls, all in her space and she blocking me out with her butt and elbows. I step around her and jump to get the rebound. Once the ball is in my hands, I throw elbows trying to get people off me. I dribble around them, faking one of the girls out and focusing on guarding the ball from the girl I call Swiper, because she always swipes the ball when you dribble by her. 

“Pass the ball Woods!” Indra calls from the sidelines but I ignore her again. I'm about to make my move to go around Swiper but unbeknownst to me, there is a girl who comes up behind me and smacks the ball outta my hand. Swiper catches it and dribbles down and gets a point. The whistle blows, calling a timeout. We walk over to indra and the play board.

“That selfish move just got them another point, Woods.” Indra nearly spits.

“I had it under control.” I fold my arms over my chest.

“Obviously you didn't! Your teammate was wide open, you had two people on you!” She looks like she might break the board in her hand. “You can take the bench Woods.” 

“What?” My mouth drops open. “There are six minutes left on the board! You're gonna send in one of the newbies or something? I'm the damn Commander for a reason, I know how to handle a ball.”

“And i'm the damn coach!” Indra yells back. “You can't follow orders today. That's the second time within minutes that you've been stupid and pretty much handed the other team the ball. Now sit down! You're benched.” My jaw clenches as I drop onto the bench. The adrenaline pumping through my body isn't helping with my pissed off attitude. I know i'm in the wrong and i'm being beyond stupid today but my pride is getting the best of me at this moment.

The buzzer blows, calling the end of the game. The opposite team wins with 26 points and we had 20. The team goes back into the locker room and I stay out on the bench for a few minutes before slipping into the locker room as well. I lean against the wall as I listen to Indra as she goes off on the team but then comes back with encouraging words telling us that we losing is a part of life and we must learn from it. After she is done and everyone goes and takes showers I pull her to the side.

“I want to apologize for being out of line today coach. I'm just in a funk of a mood today.” I rub the back of my neck as I speak.

“I understand. But next time, don't let your emotions take over your better judgment. Especially for your team.”

“Yes ma’am.” I nod my head and she claps my back as she walks out. I make my way into the shower. Anya throws a bar of soap at me and I catch it with ease.

“Don't pull that shit again Lex.” She doesn't look angry, she just looks cross.

“I won't.” She nods. I step into the steaming shower.

After getting cleaned up and clothes back on, I round the corner from the locker room to see Clarke walking towards me. There is nobody left inside the stadium and even if there were I don't think it would have stopped me from saying what I did next.

“What the hell Griffin! Where were you?” My anger coming back full force at seeing her there in front of me. “We needed you this game, damn it! Don't even bother getting dressed for next game because you're benched!” I'm beyond angry. 

“You need to back off Woods! You don't know anything about what's going on in my life right now!” Clarke clenched her hands and I could see the temper rise in her cheeks.

“I knew I was right about your type! Staying out all night sleeping around and missing an important early game!” I spat and regretted it almost instantly when i saw Clarke's pained expression.

“Fuck you Woods! Fuck you.” I can see the tears welling up in her eyes and my chest clenches with pain because I caused that look. She walks away passing by Anya and Raven who had rushed their way over when they heard our argument. Raven tried to grab Clarke's shoulder but she pushed her away. Raven then made her way towards me. I could nearly see smoke coming out of her ears by how furious she looked.

“What the hell is wrong with you!?!” Raven shoves me hard and I take a large step back. “You have no clue what Clarke is going through right now and why she wasn't here for the game!” She shoves me again, but i straighten and clench my fists as I tower over her.

“She knows the rules, no missing a game unless medical issues.” I say low and firm. “Not for sleeping over at her boy toy's house.” Next thing I know Ravens fist collides with my jaw hard, so hard that I fall backwards into the bleacher. My back slams into the bench, knocking the air from my lungs.

“She does have medical issues! That guy you saw her with was her cancer buddy!” Raven hits me again and I can taste the metallic of blood in my mouth. I wipe it away with the back of my hand as Anya pulls Raven away from me.

“What?” The words not really registering. 

“She has fucking cancer you asshole! She has cancer again!” Raven goes from trying to kill me with livid eyes to bursting into a sob. She covers her face with both hands as Anya pulls her into a hug.   
My world starts to spin and my stomach clenches as I have the urge to puke my guts out on the basketball court.

“No…” I whisper. Anya looks at me with sadness in her eyes. “Clarke has cancer?” That can't be right...That doesn't make sense. She’s a healthy energetic young woman. “What do you mean she has cancer again? She's had it before?” The amount of news my brain is processing is making me dizzy. I really don't know anything about my roommate. “Why didn't she just say something?” It's barely above a whisper.

“She was coming here to tell you.” Anya says gently. “She only told Indra why she wasn't going to be at the game, she didn't want it as public knowledge.” I nod my head.

“She stayed with Wells last night because he didn't want her to leave and do something stupid. This morning she came over to mine and Octavia's place.” Raven was trying to catch her breath and stop crying. “You should have seen her...She looked like she hadn't slept at all, and instead just cried for twelve hours straight.” She shakes her head before burying it back into Anya’s shoulder. I slowly stand up, my legs are wobbly and I make my way to the bathroom to throw up. Blood and vomit cover the toilet bowl water. This can't be happening to Clarke...She doesn't deserve this. She deserves all the happiness in the world, not cancer for a second time. I heave trying to get a deep enough breath before the next round of bile forms in my throat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know your feels down in the comments please!


	7. Lexa takes care of Clarke

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke comes home completely drunk. Lexa takes care of her and tries to apologize.

I stumble down the hall of my dorm building. And somehow successfully make it to my door. I can't get the key to go in the hole which just makes me giggle. I grab my own hand with my other hand to try and steady myself but it just makes it worse. Thankfully I don't have to concentrate too long because the door fly's open causing me to fall forward into the room and into someones arms.

“Clarke…” Lexa breaths against my hair and I can't help but shiver. Lexa's hands are gripping my arms.

“Hiya roomie.” I lean away from her and giggle. Her curly hair pulled up into a messy bun, her muscular arms and tatto can be seen fully in her cut off shirt and she has a bruise on the side of her cheek.

“Clarke you're drunk...And hurt!” Lexa gently grabs my face and tilts it upwards, her green eyes full of concern. My lip has dried blood and my face is swollen with bruises.

“And veryyy drunk.” I can't help but laugh. She searches my eyes before dropping her hands to my hands and pulling me inside.

“What happened to you?” She sits me on my bed and grabs a bottle water from the mini fridge and pours a little onto a napkin before making me take a drink and then gently pressing it against my swollen eye.

“Some bitch pissed me off and we got into a fight. No big deal.” She gently wipes the blood from lip with the wet napkin.

“No big deal? What, was she like seven feet tall and three hundred pounds? Your face looks like shit!”

“Well what a sweet compliment.” She ignores me and continues.

“Are you hurt anywhere else?” She checks my arms, running her fingers against my skin then pulls up my shirt to see a nasty bruise on my side and a good cut on my lower back. “Shit.” She whispers.

“It's all good. I can't feel a thing! Just like I can't feel the cancer killing me from the inside.” I say with disgust. The reason I wanted to get so drunk was to forget. Forget that my life had just been turned upside down for the second time. But no matter how much I drank, it was at the forefront of my mind. I saw Lexa stiffen at the mention of my cancer.

“Clarke…” Her eyes are wide and full of...of something that I can't put my finger on in this drunken state of mind.

“What? I'm assuming Raven told you about my cancer after she gave you this.” I press my fingers to the bruise on Lexa’s jaw and cheek bone. Her skin was soft and her jaw is the perfect strong shape.

“I'm sorry.” She whispered and I snatch my fingers from her face as I scowl at her.

“I don't want your damn pity Woods.” I clench my jaw.

“I-i...No Clarke listen, i'm sorry for being such an asshole. I was angry about the game and some other stuff going on and I took it out on you.” She looks away as she gets up to grab something from her drawer. When she sits back down, I see its a small medical kit. “May I fix your gash on your back?” I nod my head and slip off my shirt. I can see her throat bob as she swallows.

“Oh come on Lexa. Its not like this is the first time you've seen me without my shirt.” I smirk and she maneuvers behind me, one leg under her as her other one is outstretched beside me. I put my hand on her thigh, playing with the fabric of her basketball shorts she always seems to wear while she relaxes.

“No, its not the first time. But it still has an effect on me every time nonetheless.” She says quietly and I turn my head a little to get a glimpse of the blush rising up her neck. If my cheeks were not already pink from alcohol i'm sure she would have noticed my blush as well.

She puts some neosporin on my cut before putting a big band aid on it. Her fingers run across my bruise and my breath catches in my throat. Not because it hurts, but because it is Lexa Woods fingers against my skin.

“I'm sure its not as bad as it looks.” I whisper.

“Will you forgive me Clarke?” She asks just as quietly. Ignoring my statement.

“My drunken self says yes, but I don't know if my sober self will agree with said, self.” I giggle and turn to look at her more fully. Her fingers leave my side and instead she folds them in her lap. She won't meet my. So I gently cup her chin and make her look at me. There is sorrow in her eyes old and new.

“Will you be okay Clarke?”

“I’ve fought this cancer off before, so i'm sure I can again.” I half smile and brush my lips against her cheek. “Don't worry about me.”

“I am worried Clarke. I have been worried about you for longer than I care to admit. This just adds to the worriedness.” She slips her hand up my neck and rests it on the nape of my neck, bringing our foreheads to rest together.

“I noticed something yesterday when I saw you.” I mumble.

“Whats that?”

“You were jealous when you saw Wells and I together.” I say matter a factly.

“I uh…” she leans back and looks at me. 

"It was kinda cute actually." I smirk.

"Jealousy is not cute Clarke." She scowls at me.

"So you do admit to being jealous then?" I cant help but laugh at her expression. “There’s nothing to be jealous of though.” I grab her hand and play with her fingers. “Can I be honest about something?” I ask and she nods her head as she looks deeply into my eyes. “ I don't want to kiss Wells...I really want to kiss you.” I see shock cross her features.

“W-what? Even after I've been such an asshole?” Her eyes are big and bright green.

“Are you trying to talk me out of kissing you?” I laugh lightly.

“N-no! I mean, yes, i mean...I don't know! Clarke you're drunk, I don't want you to like...regret doing such a thing in the morning, I don't want to take advantage of your drunken state and kiss you and-” I lean in, making her abruptly stop her rambling.

“Drunk or not, I know that I want to kiss you.” I'm confident in my words and I see her eyes drop to my lips.

“Clarke, I want to kiss you too.” She runs her thumb on the back of my neck. “But not when you are this drunk. I rather kiss you sober and know its something you actually want. Do you understand my reasoning?” I see pleading in her eyes and I can't help but smile at her being sincere and considerate.

“I do understand. Will you lay with me instead?” Her eyebrows shoot up but she nods. I slip from the bed, pulling my pants off and grabbing an oversize shirt and loose shorts before crawling back into bed with her. Her back is against the wall and my back is against her front. I grab her arm and lay it across my waist, intertwining my fingers with hers.

“Is sober Clarke going to kick my ass in the morning when she sees what position we are in?” Lexa chuckles.

“Nah, i'm sure sober Clarke could be bribed with a coffee.” I mumble as sleep soon begins to take over me.

"You're not gonna die Clarke." Lexa whispers, referring to what I said earlier in the night. "You cant." She kisses the back of my head and I snuggle more into her.

_______________________

I wake with a pounding headache. I crack my eye to see the bright white walls and I groan. I throw my arm over my eyes. Why did I go get so damn drunk? Soon the memories start to come back, getting in a fight with Lexa, I have cancer. Me running out crying, I have cancer. Me finding my self at a bar downing shots, I have cancer. Coming home to Lexa and sleeping in her arms. I have cancer. Cancer cancer cancer.   
I feel a tear slip down my cheek, making my head pound even more. I don't need this right now. One problem at a time please. I hear the door open quietly and I convince myself to open my eyes slightly again. The room is still harshly bright but seeing Lexa in her dark clothing with dark hair is a nice contrast.

“Hey you're awake.” She kneels down beside the bed near my head. “I tried to get back before you awoke.” She swipes a tear from my cheek with her thumb but doesn't comment on it. I can still see the concern in her eyes. “I brought you coffee.”

“Coffee.” I smile at the thought. 

“Yeah I thought I would take drunk Clarke’s advice and bring you some.” She smiles at me.

“Mm smart woman.” I slowly sit up and take the offered coffee and take a sip. It tastes exactly how I usually get mine. 

“I've noticed what you usually put in yours. Two creams, one sugar. Right?” She bit her lip.

“Yeah that is right actually.” I take another drink, letting the hot liquid burn my throat. “Thank you Lexa.” I look over my cup and into those bright eyes. She’s sitting cross legged on the ground, leaning her chin on her arm which is perched on the mattress. And she looks beautiful.

“Of course Clarke. Take these.” She hands me two aspirins and I take them happily. “So…” She focuses her eyes at picking at the fabric of the sheets. “Do you remember much of last night?” I know shes referring to me admitting I wanted to kiss her.

“I do. I remember everything.” She looks up at me then. “And I still stand by my statement.” She studies me for a couple beats before nodding her head. We sit in silence for a few minutes. Neither of us sure what to say about our feelings as of right now.

“So...Whats going to happen to you now Clarke?” Its barely above a whisper.

“My parents will be here today and Ill be having surgery tomorrow.” I stare at my coffee cup and I can feel Lexa staring at me.

“What are they going to do?”

“Remove a kidney. Hopefully that will take out all the cancer with it.” I sigh and finally meet her eyes. “It wont be good if it doesn't get all the cancer Lexa.” My vision slowly start to blur.

“Hey, listen I know its scary Clarke but you cant think about the possibility of them not being able to successfully get the cancer.” She stands up and gently takes the coffee from my hand and crawls into bed with me, sitting with one leg under her and the other one out stretched. She gently pulls me into her lap and wraps her arms around me. “All you can focus on right now is the removal of the kidney going all as planned. Okay?” 

“I'm so scared.” I cry as I grip her shirt. This is the first time we have been open and honest with each other in the daylight.

“I know. And it is alright to be scared, its natural. Everyone is gonna be here to have your back, Ill even come to the hospital for your surgery if you'd like me too?” I nod my head and she rubs my arms. “Okay, then I will be there. I promise.” She kisses my head and I feel a warmness spread inside as I begin to calm down. 

“Thank you.” I whisper into her shirt.

“Of course Clarke.” She holds me until there is a rapid knock on the door that jolts us both. Lexa gets up to answer it.

“Is Clarke here?” I hear Octavia’s voice. Lexa steps aside as her and Raven make their way into the room.

“What the hell Clarke! Do you not answer your phone anymore?” Raven makes her way over to the night stand where I must have layed my phone last night. 

"Quiet voices Raven please." I rub my temple as it pounds. She scoffs looks at the lock screen before tossing it at me. 23 messages and 7 phone calls. All from Raven Octavia and even one from Lincoln. Raven is pissed and Octavia seems worried.

“I'm sorry you guys it was just a bad night.” I plead.

“Yeah should we be worried about the other guy?” Octavia sits on the bed and gently grabs my chin, turning it from one side to the other, examining my bruises.

“Unfortunately no, I am the other guy in this situation.” I half smile.

“Well do we need to beat someone up for you?” O cracks her fingers.

“No no it was my fault anyway.” I reach for my coffee on the night stand that Lexa had gotten me. I notice the girl sitting on the bed quietly watching us interact. I send her a small smile which she returns.

“I was worried...We were worried Clarke.” Raven sits down now.

“I know, i'm so sorry. I just couldn't handle anything else. I got home safely and Lexa took care of me." I motioned to her and her eyes got slightly wider as the other two girls look at her.

“How drunk was she last night?” Octavia asks. 

“Very. She was literally holding her hand with her other hand trying to steady it enough to unlock the door.” Lexa smirks as Raven and Octavia laugh.

“Wow thanks make fun of the drunk girl.” I roll my eyes and take a drink of my coffee.

“We love you Clarkey.” Octavia gets on top of me and wraps me into a bear hug.

“Yeah yeah sure.” I poke her sides and she sequels, bringing laughter from everyone.

“So, we know that drunk Clarke got into a bar fight and got this shiner, but how did you get yours?” Octavia asked Lexa who instantly looked down at her lap.

“That would be my doing.” Raven raises her hand. “And i'm not sorry for it. She was being a real bitch.” Raven folds her arms over her chest and sets her jaw. Lexa looks up at her and nods.

“I was. And I completely deserved it.” Lexa then looks at me and I see the apology still in her eyes.

“Okay this is so not fair, you all get into fights and i'm the only one who is actually boxing and I cant even get into a planned fight?” Octavia looks at all of us with a frustrated look on her face. “That's just not fair.” We all laugh and I pull Octavia into another hug.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know i know, Clarke gets bruises and gets drunk a lot. Hopefully both habits end here. Please let me know your thoughts! Good or bad. I thought I would change it up a bit and make Lexa the doc instead of Clarke all the time. :)


	8. Hospitals suck. But Tulips make it better.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke has her surgery. Lexa meets the parents and also has a talk with Wells after flustering talk with Raven and Octavia.

All hospitals have that smell...The smell of ‘clean air’ that is anything but that. In reality it just smells like Clorox, antiseptics and death. Its always made my stomach churn. The smell of the hospital brought back terrible memories. I had to take a second to steady my breathing when I walked into the lobby. Losing one girl I loved here was bad enough, coming here to possibly lose another girl that I've grown to care about is not so great either. 

I go to the desk and ask for Clarke Griffins room. Room 426. I take the stairs because I need to get some of this anxiety out of my system. Once i'm on the right level and at the door of 426, i gently knock and a tall man with blonde hair and bright blue eyes answers the door.

“Yes?” He smiles at me and I nervously smile back.

“I'm looking for Clarke?” I shift from one foot to the other.

“Come on in, I'm Jake Griffin, Clarke's dad.” He moves out of the doorway and lets me step in.

“Lexa Woods.” I shake his hand as I see Clarke laying in the hospital bed. She looks tired. More so since the last time I seen her. She left yesterday and stayed with her parents at the hotel. 

“Hi there Lexa, I'm Abby Griffin.” A shorter lady with a kind smile stepped towards me shaking my hand. Clarke might have her dads blonde hair and blue eyes, but she has her mother's facial structure and body shape.

“Nice to meet you both.” I smile at them and walk over to Clarke’s bed where she’s been watching the interaction quietly. “Hey you.” I gingerly lock her pointer finger with mine.

“Hey, you came.” Her bright smile lighting up the whole room.

“I told you i would be here Clarke.” I smile at her.

“So you are Clarke’s roommate right?” Mr. Griffin asks. I let go of Clarke’s finger and turn to face Abby.

“Yes, and basketball teammate.” I stuff my hands into my pockets of my dark loose jeans. 

“We have heard a lot of good things about you Lexa.” Mrs. Griffin smiles at me and I look to a blushing Clarke. We didn't have much time together before the door opens and in comes Raven and Octavia.

“Mama and Papa G!” Octavia throws her arms around both of them as does Raven.

“My other two favorite daughters!” Mr. Griffin laughs. I step off to the side of the room to make room for the girls.

“Whatever Papa G, you know you love me more.” Octavia pokes him in the chest. And he winks at her which makes Raven roll her eyes.

“Whatever. You guys suck. You love me right Mama G?” Raven pouts.

“Of course darling.” She pulls her into another hug. “Even after you blew up my kitchen back in high school.” That makes everyone laugh. I enjoyed seeing how they all interacted together, the memories and connections of long friendships.

“I thought you guys had class at this hour.” Clarke says after both girls hug her.

“I had to come and see you one last time with both your kidneys.” Raven wipes a fake tear from her eye as she grabs Clarke's hand. “I'm gonna miss you little kidney Clarke.” Raven whispers to Clarke’s stomach which makes her laugh. Leave it up to Raven to make a joke out of something as terrible as cancer. I can see how Clarke got through the first time with cancer. Having friends like this helped.

“Thanks Raven, my kidney will miss you too.” Clarke shakes her head but she’s still smiling. 

“And I only came because I hate my math class that is at this hour. I figured you were a good enough excuse to skip.” Octavia shrugs and Clarke punches her in the arm, gaining a laugh from everyone. The door opens again and the doctor walks in, seeing all of us.

“Wow, looks like a great support system you have here Clarke. Mind if I add one more?” The doctor motions behind him where Wells is standing. “I found him wandering the halls.” I look to see Clarke's face brighten and my chest clenches at the way she looks at him.

“Glad I got here in time. Class ran longer than usual.” He makes his way over to Clarke and gives her a hug. 

“I'm glad you made it Wells.” She kisses his cheek and I clench my jaw. I know Clarke told me there is nothing to be jealous of, but I cant help it when I want to be the one she looks at like that. I want those lips on my cheek, or even on my own lips. I shake my head at the thought, thats not fair to think about right now.

“Well Clarke, it is time for you to go in.” The doctor says. “If you all would make your way to the waiting room, that would be appreciated.” We start walking out of the door.

“My baby girl is in good hands right Dr Cooper?” I hear Clarke’s dad ask.

“Yes most definitely Mr. Griffin.” I look back to see Clarke's parents kiss her and hug her and even pray with her. I make eye contact with those bright blue tired eyes one last time before walking away. I sit in a seat beside Octavia and across from Wells and Raven.

“So, you're dating my cousin.” I say to Octavia who smiles shyly at me.

“Yeah, He said that you convinced him to ask me out.” She tucks a piece of her hair behind her ear. “Guess I owe you a thanks.”

“Nah, no reason to thank me, he can just be dense sometimes.” I smile at her and she laughs. “He's a good guy though.” I look at her more sternly. “Don't break his big heart or I will break your face.” She nods her head and looks me in the eyes.

“I wouldn't dream of it.” 

“Good.” I say in reply.

“Are you two having the ‘Don't hurt him or i'll kill you’ talk?” Raven shakes her head.

“Yeah, she's dating my cousin. And you are dating my best friend, So the same goes for you.” I narrow my eyes. “You hurt her, I hurt you.” She lifts her hands in surrender.

“List, your best friend is way outta my league.” She laughs. “I won't screw it up.” She smirks. “But now, you and Clarke…”

“What?” I furrow my brows.

“We know you got the feels for Clarke.” Octavia is also smirking.

“I uh…” I scratch the back of my head. “I don't know what you guys are talking about. We are just roommates.” I look between the two of them.

“Don't get all antsy in your pantsy’s, she’s got the feels for you too.” Raven winks and I just shake my head. 

“So when are you gonna tap that?” My jaw drops and I look over at Octavia who looked just as smug.

“W-what? I'm not tapping anything! And don't talk about Clarke like that.” I'm flustered and irritated that these two brats got under my usual stoic attitude.

“Wow, the Commander stutters when she’s nervous.” Raven raises her eyebrow.

“And get defensive.” Octavia adds.

“You two are assholes.” I stand up.

"Takes one to know one!" Raven says as I walk over to the coffee machine, I flip her off which just makes both of them laugh. I take longer than I need to get my coffee. I didnt want to go back and get teased about something Im still trying to figure out myself.

“Don't let those two bother you.” I turn and see Wells standing behind me. “They used to tease me like that with Clarke.” He smiles but I see a touch of sadness there, and my jealousy rises at the mention that he used to be teased in the same way by how he felt about Clarke.

“So did you two...Date?” I grab my cup of coffee and busy myself with putting in cream and sugar. Not really sure if I want to know the answer or not.

“No.” He laughs. “Clarke was always a great friend and at one point I did want to date her.” He shuffled his feet. “But Clarke never looked at me like she looks at you.” I meet his eyes at that point. “Just don't wait too long to try something with her.” 

“I won't.” I nearly whisper. That's the first time I have said anything about it out loud about wanting to try something with Clarke and it feels right. “This whole thing is a sort of wake up call.” I motion around the waiting room. “It's not the first time I waited too long and something bad happened. But this time, I will have more time I hope.” I take a sip of my hot coffee, letting the burning liquid wash away the memories of Costia laying in the that car covered in blood.

“Clarke’s going to be alright.” He nods back towards our seats where we sit for several more hours.

_______________________

It was late by the time I got back to the hospital. My work called me in and when I got off I came straight back here. It was past visiting hours but I sweet talked one of the older nurses and she snuck me in. I quietly walked into Clarke's room. It was past midnight and she was sleeping. She looked a little paler than before she went into surgery, but that's normal. I pull up a chair closer to her bed and laid the single yellow tulip on the bed side table and I gently slip her hand into mine. Her soft small hands fitting perfectly in mine.

“Hey.” Clarke’s voice croaked as it broke through the silence. I look up to see tired blue eyes looking at mine.

“I thought you were asleep. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you.” I rub my thumb across her skin.

“You came back.” She smiles softly

“Of course I did. I apologize I wasn't here when you got out of surgery. Work called me in.” I half shrug.

“Where do you work?” Clarke cocks her head to the side. “You've never mentioned it before.”

“I work at an animal shelter downtown.” I scratch the back of my neck with my free hand.

“You work with animals?” Clarke quirks an eyebrow.

“Yes I do. Why is that hard to believe?” I smirk.

“You just...You don't seem like an animal person.” Clarke chuckles

“There's a lot that we don't seem to know about each other it seems, roomie.” I bring her hand up to my lips where I lay a gentle kiss. “How are you feeling?” 

“Like...Like i'm missing something inside me.” Clarke's eyebrows furrow. “Kinda empty. And it hurts a lot honestly.” 

“I'm glad you're okay though Clarke, that the surgery went well. I'm so sorry it came down to this.”

“It's okay. The doctor says that it looks like they got all the cancer.” She smiles and her eyes close for a second too long to be a blink.

“You need to go back to sleep. It's late.” She looks over at the side table to see the time.

“Its almost one in the morning. Visiting hours ended at nine, how in the world did you get in here?”

“I can be a sweet talker when I need too.” I smirk. 

“So you needed to see me huh?” She smirks back. That comment caught me off guard. I did need to see her though. I needed to see with my own eyes that she was okay.

“Yes actually.” I state matter factly. “I needed to see that you were okay.” I squeezed her hand slightly and her eyes soften.

“Im okay Lexa." I nod. She squeezes my hand. "And you brought me a flower?” She nods towards the tulip on the side table.

“Yeah. But it looks pretty lame compared to all these bouquets of flowers though.” I motion to all the other flowers around her room I chuckle lightly. She slips her hand from mine and grabs the flower. I clasp my hands in front of me.

“I think it's beautiful Lexa.” She brings it up to her nose and I hear her satisfied sigh after smelling it. “Thank you.” She looks at me again. She looks like she wants to say something but seems to be having a hard time wording it. “Why did you only start expressing your feelings for me after finding out i had cancer?” My voice catches in my throat. I didn't expect that. But as all our intimate talks seem to be in the dead of the night, i figure I should be honest.

“Because i was being stupid and you getting cancer again just reminded me that life is too short to not try for something you want.” She’s quiet as she looks at me with those big blue eyes. A slow smile begins to spread across her face. “But like I said, you need to go back to sleep. I'll see you tomorrow. Or today i guess. We can talk more about all that when you're not gonna fall asleep on me.” I smile back at her.

“I'm looking forward to that.” She bites her lip.

“Good night Clarke.” I lean up and kiss her temple.

“Goodnight Lex.” She whispers and I step outside of the door. I take one last look at her admiring the flower I gave her and I knew I was screwed. Screwed in the best most scariest way possible because I cared for this girl and could see myself spending an abundant amount of time with her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Im sorry im late on posting! A lot has happened this week! I turned 21 (HELL YASSS!) And my house got struck by lighting, catching it on fire. 0.0 But all is fine, my house is still here and everyone's safe! 
> 
> What do you all think of the progression between our two favorite girls? Please leave me comments to let me know if im satisfying you all! :)


	9. Aden

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You get to know Aden more and understand the relationship between him and Lexa.

It's been five days since I had my surgery. I was able to leave the hospital yesterday. My parents brought me back to my dorm and refused to leave. Lexa was kind enough to offer to let them sleep in here and she would go stay at Lincolns for the night. My mom tried to tell her they would sleep on the floor but Lexa wouldn't hear it. But now my parents were about to head back to the airport. Octavia was driving them and Raven was in class. So Lexa offered to come back and take care of me. 

“Okay Lexa, you take care of my baby girl for me, I leave her in your hands, don't make me cut off those hands if something bad happens to her.” He tells Lexa who just laughs.

“Dad, stop harassing Lexa, i'll be fine!” I give Lexa an apologetic look.

“She’s fine! She knows i'm kidding.” He then leans over to her a little. “You do know i'm kidding right?” He asks quietly.

“Yes I know you're joking.” Lexa laughs. They had been getting to know each other the last few days and seem to get along pretty well. I've not seen Lexa laugh as much until my dad starts telling her jokes or funny stories. It makes my heart beat a little faster listening to her laugh.

“You sure you'll be okay honey? I'm so sorry we have stupid jobs that require us home.” My mom says. “Jake, we should just quit our jobs and move here with Clarke.”

“Oh yes, great idea!” Dad claps his hands together.

“Whoa whoa whoa! No way! You guys get outta here!” I laugh and point towards the door.

“Ouch no love.” Dad shakes his head and mom grabs her purse and kisses my head. 

“I love you, we will let you know when we land.” Mom walks over to the door where Octavia just arrived.

“Ready to go Mama G and Papa G?” 

“Yes we are. Love you.” Dad gives me a hug and high fives Lexa before walking out.

“Love you guys.”

“I'll see you in a while Clarke.” Octavia waves.

I lay back against the headboard of my bed and sigh.

“Are you okay?” Lexa sits on the edge of my bed.

“Yeah, just...tired.” I shrug.

“How about you sleep?” 

“No.” I shake my head. “I don't wanna.” This is the first time in almost a week Lexa and I have been alone.

“No?” She quirks an eyebrow. “Are you five or something Clarke? You literally just pouted.” She smirks.

“Not even.” I narrow my eyes. “I just don't wanna sleep right now. I want to talk with you.” I fidget with my fingers.

“Okay, what would you like to talk about Clarke?” She scoots further onto my bed, her back against my wall.

“What's your favorite color?” She looks at me skeptically.

“Blue? Why?” She chuckles a little.

“Mines Green. And because, you said we don't know all that much about each other and I want to change that.” I smile widely.

“Alright fair enough. Dog or cat?” She crosses her legs Indian style.

“Cat.” I think back to my childhood cat. “I used to have a white cat named Mr. Snuffles.”

“Mr. Snuffles?” Lexa throws her head back laughing and I can't help but admire her delicate neck.

“Yes, and he was a wonderful cat! Don't make fun of me as a little kid! I didn't know any better.” I mumble and cross my arms.

“Its cute! And I imagine little Clarke was pretty dang cute too.” She grabs my legs and stretches them across her lap.

“What were you like as a kid?” I look at the young lady in front of me and try to imagine what a little Lexa would be and look like.

“I was a troublemaker for sure.” She laughs. I love her laugh, I'm not used to hearing it, but the last couple days she has been more free with her laughter. More comfortable. 

“No surprise there.” I roll my eyes.

“I pretty much lived in my tree house, I loved being outside in nature.” I can see her memories are taking her back to those days as she looks off at the wall across the room.

“What's your major?”

“History.”

“You enjoy history?” I look at her skeptically.

“Yes Clarke.” She chuckles. “You are very surprised at my life choices apparently. Don't think i'm nice enough to work at an animal shelter, don't think i'm smart enough to be a history major.” She sighs and shakes her head but I can still see a small smile.

“No! No, its just that you come across as big badass who i figure would be going into sports or something for you to kick someones butt.” I shrug. “I just didn't think of you as a teacher. But I like it, you'll be a good teacher. Specially with that death glare of yours.” I wink and her jaw drops.

“I don't have that bad of a glare.” She crosses her arms and I let out a loud laugh.

“Oh yes you do Ms. Woods.” I grab her arm, causing her to uncross them and interlock our fingers. “But I think its cute.”

“My death glare is not cute Clarke.” She scoffs.

“The first couple times it was scary, but once I got to know you, its just cute to see you frustrated.” 

“Whatever.” She rolls her eyes. “You realize that you're flirting with me though right?” Her bright green eyes making my stomach flip.

“Yes I know. Its kinda the point.” I smirk and she smirks back. Her phone ringing broke our trance. She reaches into her loose skinny khaki pants with her free hand and answers it.

“Hello?” She furrows her brow as the person on the other end talks. Her body tenses. “What? Are you serious?” She looks at me and I squeezed her hand lightly. “Gustus, you never let me see him but now you're literally dropping him at my door step? With no heads up I might add, what the hell do you have to do that is so important you are leaving him with me?” She slips her hand from mine and rubs her eyes. “Alright alright of course he can come, don't be stupid. So do you need him to stay the night with me? Yeah alright ill be right down.” The call ended and she stares at it for a second.

“Are you okay?” I ask softly.

“Yeah yeah.” She nods. “Would you mind if Aden comes up and hangs out with us?” She asks almost shyly.

“Yeah id love that. I really enjoyed him last time we met.” She smiles at that and relaxes a bit.

“I didn't know if you liked kids or not, and i know i'm supposed to be taking care of you today and you just had surgery and I don't want him to tire you or frustrate you or-” I put my finger on her lips quieting her. Her eyes widen at the gesture but stops talking all the same.

“You were rambling. Go get him Lexa.” i remove my finger from her lips and she smiles and makes her way to the door.

“Ill be right back, don't more. You're dad would kill me if something happened to you.” She winks and shuts the door behind her. Within minutes the door opens again and in comes Aden and Lexa right behind him.

“I don't know Lex, Vegeta is cool and everything but I love Goku.”

“Whatever kid, you just play the gameboy version. You need to watch the show.” Lexa sets Aden's bag by the door and Aden makes his way to my bed and hops up.

“Hi Clarke! I'm glad you're here.” He smiles widely.

“I'm glad too.” I smile back. “Are you two talking about Dragon Ball Z?”

“Yeah! Do you know much about it?”

“Of course I do! I loved that show. And what was even better was Zoids and Gundam wing.”

“Wow.” I look up at Lexa who is smirking.

“What?”

“You are a nerd.” 

“No I'm not.” I scoff. Aden is looking between Lexa and I.

“Yes you are. You're a nerd and I think I just found you a touch more attractive.” Her eyes widened at her own words. “I-i means…” She scratches the back of her head.

“Now who’s flirting.” I wink at her which just makes her blush more. “Anyway, You should watch both of those shows Aden.” I direct my conversation back to him but still watching Lexa who is shifting from one foot to the other. “Maybe later today we can.” 

“Are you serious? Oh that would be so cool! Can we please Lexa?” The excitement bubbling in his eyes.

“Of course buddy. We can do that.” Lexa looks up at me right as I yawn. “How about we watch it now and let Clarke fall asleep.” I narrow my eyes and shake my head. But grab my laptop and and search for Zoids on my hard drive where I have them saved. I find the first episode and Lexa sets the laptop on a chair and she slides onto the bed between Aden and I. Aden is watching the screen intently and I can see hes going to love this show.

“Thats Liger Zero, he’s awesome. And just gets cooler as the show goes on.” I slide down into the bed and Lexa grabs my legs, stretching them across her lap. She runs her hands up and down my legs and I'm grateful I remembered to shave my legs the last time I was in the shower. I find myself drifting to sleep from the comforting touching of Lexa and her warmth and the background noise of the show and Aden and Lexa’s voices.

 

When I wake, I stretch and slowly open my eyes. Lexa is gone but Aden is still sitting there watching the laptop.

“Hi, you're awake. I hope you don't mind that we switched it to gundam wings? I really wanted to see what this one was like too! I loved Zoids.”

“No thats fine Aden.” I smile at him. “Where is Lexa?” 

“Oh she just left to get some food. Her stomach was growling so i convinced her to get Chinese take out! I never get to have Chinese take out.” I sit up slowly, feeling the pain of my stitches, I take a second to let out a long breath. “Are you okay Clarke? Can I help you? Lexa told me to take care of you while she’s gone.” He’s looking at me with those big brown eyes and He has his hand on my arm.

“I'm okay buddy, I just gotta take it slow.” I finally sit up and he grabs a pillow and puts it behind my back. “Thank you.” He smiles at me and scoots closer to me.

“Can I lean against you? Or is that gonna hurt?” He looks me up and down and I just open my arms, he slides into me. I haven't hugged on a kid in a long time and it feels good. I've missed kids.

“So can I ask you something?” He nods his head. “Who is Gustus to you?”

“Oh, he’s my foster dad.”

“And Lexa?”

“She’s trying to adopt me.” He smiles widely at me. “I love her.”

“She loves you too.” Before I can ask any more questions we hear the door open and in comes Lexa, Raven and Octavia.

“Hey sweet cheeks, how are you feeling?” Raven asks.

“I'm doing better, thanks for asking.”

“And who is this little guy?” Octavia asks as she kneels in front of Aden and I.

“I'm Aden.” He sticks his hand out to shake hers. “I'm 7.”

“Well nice to meet you little man. I'm Octavia and that crazy looking lady is Raven.” He waves at her and she smiles.

“I brought Chinese take out.” Lexa motions towards the different boxes lined up on the desk. Raven doesn't need to be told twice, she opens the boxes and chooses the one she wants. 

“I have the shrimp rice if anyone wants some. She grabs a fork and sits on Lexa’s bed.

“What would you like?” Octavia asks Aden.

“Anything with noodles.”

“Okay, chicken lo mien for you.” She hands him the box and fork. “Honey chicken for me.” She sits down beside Raven.

“Clarke, what can I get you?” Lexa asks.

“Do you have any sesame seed chicken?”

“Sure do. Mind if I share with you?” She grabs the box and I nod as she sits on the bed Indian style, her arm brushing against mine. She hands me the box and a fork and I dig in. It tastes so good and I realize its been ages since ive eaten Chinese food. Lexa sticks her fork in taking a bite for herself.

We all eat and talk about random things, getting to know Aden a little better. Octavia and Raven getting to know Lexa a little better, as am I.

“Wait, you’ve been shanked?” Raven’s mouth drops open and Lexa looks over to make sure Aden is asleep beside her. His head is in my lap and my fingers are running through his shaggy hair.

“Yeah, it was a bad point in my life.” Lexa’s face darkens at the memories but pulls the collar of her shirt away from her neck to reveal a three or so inch scar just below her shoulder and above her chest.

“Well shit.” Octavia states. “Lincoln wasn't kidding when he said not to mess with you because you've been in more fights than he has. I was thinking boxing wise, not actual street fights.”

“Like I said, it was a bad point in my life. Nothing to be proud of.” She shrugs and lets go of her collar. 

“Well I don't think anyone can top that story except Clarke who has kicked cancer’s ass twice. So, since there are no more cool stories, i'm off to bed.” Raven stands and stretches.

“Right behind you.” Octavia says. “Good night.” 

“Goodnight.” Lexa and I say in unison. The door closes and we are thrown into the silence of the room beside Aden's even breathing.

“He’s a good kid.” I tuck some hair behind his ear.

“He’s a great kid.” I look up to see her smiling down at him, there is so much love in her gaze. “But he kicks a lot so ill take him over to my bed, I don't want him kicking you where you had surgery.” The thought makes me wince.

“No, its okay leave him here. He’s comfortable.”

“Clarke, I don't want him hurting you.”

“Who said anything about me sleeping with him?” I stare at her and smirk at the bob of her throat.

“I...Yeah yeah of course.” She clears her throat and I cant help but chuckle. I move Aden's head from my lap gently and pull the covers over him. The clock on the desk says its nearly one in the morning. I walk over to Lexa’s bed and slide between the covers. She turns out the light and slips off her pants. I can see her red and black boxers in the light from the lamp outside. She climbs onto the bed beside the wall and slips inside. We both turn onto our sides to face each other.

“Hi,” I nearly whisper as I stare into her bright green eyes.

“Hey. I hope you didn't mind him coming and staying the night.”

“No, of course not. He is such a sweetheart.” I gingerly inch my fingers to her collar of her shirt and pull it aside revealing the scar. “Would you tell me what happened?” She looks away and I wasn't sure if she would actually tell me.

“It wasn't long after Costia died, I had gotten into drugs and I was very angry. I really didn't care what happened to me.” She stops for a moment to take a deep breath. “I wasn't suicidal but dying didn't scare me. So I got into drugs and would get in fights with anyone about anything. One night the guy I usually got the drugs from didn't have what I wanted, he said he’d already sold all of it. So i hit him and kept hitting him until he pulled a knife on me and stabbed me. After that Lincoln and Anya took matters into their own hands and got me into rehab. I was much better after 6 months.” 

I run my fingers over the scar and slowly lean forward and gently place my lips over the scar. I hear her breath hitch and I cant help but smile at the effect i just had on her. Her skin is soft and I want to kiss more but i make myself resist.

“I'm glad you're okay now.”

“Me too Clarke.” She is staring at me with half lidded eyes. “How are you feeling?” She puts her hand on my hip and her thumb runs over the bandage on my stomach a bit.

“I'm feeling better each day.” I smile and she returns it.

“Will you tell me about your first time with cancer?” 

“I was in my junior year of high school when I began feeling sick. My parents took me to the doctor and told me I had Leukemia. I was confused and angry because why? Why would a 16 year old have cancer, you know?” Lexa nods her head. “Anyway, I started treatment and I just threw up a lot and didn't have the energy to do anything. Obviously the Doc told me I couldn't play basketball anymore which made me angry because I had scholarships and stuff but I couldn't even get myself out of bed most days anyway so it didn't matter. I lost my hair after a few months and my depression skyrocketed. I didn't want to go to school because I didn't want them seeing me like that. Octavia and Raven brought me a lot of my home work and helped me so I wouldn't fall behind. Which at some points I didn't know if i would live long enough to graduate.” I sigh and shake my head at the hard memories.

“But you're okay Clarke. You made it through that and you're making it through this.” Her green eyes were soft and her voice was quiet.

“I know. I was in complete remission a year later.” I smile remembering the tears of joy I shared with my parents when the doctor told us the news. 

“Thank you for sharing with me.” She tucked a piece of my hair behind my ear.

“Thank you for sharing with me too.” She nods her head.

“Come on, its been a long day. Go to sleep.” She smiles gently and I slide closer and lay my head on her chest.

 

________________________________

I wake up to an empty bed and the sound of the tv. I open my eyes and turn over to see Aden on the floor with a cup of cereal and watching dragon ball z.

“Hey big guy.” My voice is scratchy from sleep.

“Hi Clarke! Did I wake you? I tried to be quiet. Lexa told me I had to be quiet. I'm sorry.” His eyes were full of worry.

“No no, you didn't wake me. You did good being quiet. Where is Lexa?” I look at the clock that says its 9:52.

“Oh right.” He stood up and grabbed a piece of paper from the desk and handed it to me. “She told me to give this to you when you woke up.” He smiled and sat back down to finish his bowl of cereal.

 

'Dear Clarke,  
I'm so sorry, I had to run to work because of an emergency. I apologize for having to leave Aden but Gustus is still gone and I couldnt bring him with me. I told him to stay seated and not to wake you and to not talk your ear off once you do waken. I will be home as soon as possible.  
-Lexa'

 

“What time did she leave?” 

“About 7:15.” He was watching his show intently. I stand up and stretch. The pain in my side reminding me not to stretch enough to pull out the stitches. I grab some clothes and bathroom stuff.

“Ill be back in ten minutes. Don't go anywhere and don't answer the door unless you know the voice, okay?”

“Yes ma’am.” He nods and I walk out and down the hall to the community bathroom where I take a quick shower and brush my teeth. Once i'm back in the room I brush my hair out sitting on my bed by Aden who had moved from the ground to my bed.

“Do you like the show?” droplets of water hit my leg from my wet hair as i brush through it.

“Oh yes! I love being here with you and Lexa too. You guys are the best. I never get to watch anything at Gustus’s house.” He shifts in his seat then looks up at me. “Plus, you guys talk with me. He never takes the time to talk with me.” He shrugs. “Plus I like Lexa when she is around you. She laughs more. A lot of times she just looks…” He furrows his brow for a moment, thinking of the right thing to say. “Sad. She just looks sad. Which I understand why.” He turns his attention back to the laptop.

“Why do you think she looks sad?” She does look sad a lot. Or at least she used too. She always looked like she was carrying the weight of the world on her shoulders but her scowl usually kept people far enough away that they couldn't see the sadness in her eyes. Thankfully, I was not one of those people.

“She is having a hard time adopting me. She’s been trying for two years now. She tells me she should have tried sooner but she made bad decision. And those bad decisions are the reason the court isn't being easy on her and I.” He sighs and looks up at me again. “I really want her to win custody of me. Gustus can be mean and scary. I love Lexa.”

“She loves you to buddy.” I clasp his hand with my own. “How did you and Lexa meet?”

“Oh, she’s always been a constant in my life. She’s like a second mom to me. I've known her since I was like one or two. After mommy died, Lexa left me for several months. That really hurt, you know?” His little brows were scrunched up again. “But she came back and she promised she would take care of me. She told me that she promised my mommy that too.” She promised his mom she would take care of him? Realization hit me suddenly. 

“Aden, what was your mommy’s name?” I asked softly.

“Costia.” I turn to see the owner of the voice standing in the doorway. Lexa’s eyes were wide and I could see the sadness within them clearly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ADEN IS COSTIA'S KID!?! Whaaat...Who saw that coming? lol


	10. No time like right now.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke finds out about Costia. Aden goes back with Gustus. Lexa has a game. And some people kiss ;)

“Costia? As in…” Clarke’s voice trails off. I see the shock in her eyes.

“Yes.” I swallow hard.

“Oh.” Is all she says in reply. A variety of emotions cover her face.

“You brought a kitten?!” Aden gasps and scrambles off the bed towards me which breaks my staring contest with Clarke. I nearly forgot I was carrying a small orange kitten in my arms. The shelter didnt mind me borrowing him for the night, so i brought him for both Clarke and Aden to play with. Aden loves anything cute and Clarke loves cats. I bend down to let Aden pet him.

“Yeah, but only for the night buddy.” I look back up to see Clarke watching us. There’s a different kind of look in her eyes than usual. Sadder and partially hurt, but also something else. Aden pulling the kitten from my hands broke my lock on Clarke yet again. “Careful Aden, hes still a baby.”

“I know, I just want to hold him. Or her. Whatever it is.” He sits cross legged and cradles the kitten in his arms.

“Excuse me, I just have to use the bathroom.” Clarke brushes past us quickly. She’s out the door before I can even stand back up. 

“Stay here Aden.” I ran out the door after her. “Clarke!” I grab her arm gently and turn her around. There are tears in her eyes and anger on her lips.

“You kept his relationship to you a secret because of why?” She jerks her hand out of my grasp. “You had so many opportunities to tell me who he was. He is your girlfriend's son? He’s YOUR son? Shit Lex.” She takes a step back.

“I'm sorry Clarke, I just…” I was stuck on what to say. Why didnt I tell her? She’s met him twice. I could have told her last night but I chose not too. “It hurts to talk about Costia.” I say quietly and her eyes soften. 

“I understand that Lexa, but you've told me a lot about Costia, but never thought to mention you two have a kid together?”

“He’s not my son!” I snap at her and her eyebrows raise. “Not yet at least.” I close my eyes and breath out. The corridor was quiet and there weren't any people walking around just yet thankfully. “He was a year old when I first met them. His dad was a one night stand and Aden was the result. A wonderful wonderful result for both his mom and I. We were going to get married and I was going to legally adopt him after that but…” I cross my one arm over my chest, grabbing the other one thats hanging by my side. “Things happened, she passed away and I went off the deep end. I'm trying to fix things best I can.” Theres a long minute of silence where we both just look at each other.

“Okay.” Clarke takes a deep breath and waits a beat before she pulls me into a hug. She wraps her arms around my waist and I wrap my arms around her shoulders. We stand there for a couple minutes until she pulls back. “I do need to go to the bathroom. Ill be back in there shortly.” I nod and watch her walk off. Her messy blonde hair bouncing with each step.

When I go back into the room Aden is lying on the ground giggling as the cat climbs over him and jumps around.

“When you adopt me can we please get a cat?” He looks up at me with so much joy and my heart clenches with love.

“Of course buddy.” I smile and sit beside him. I need to get the courts on my side so this sweet boy can start fully living. Gustus wasnt showing Aden the love he needs. 

“When is the next court date?” He looks over at me.

“In a couple weeks.” I pull my knees up to my chest and wrap my arms around my legs. I suppose my worried expression was easily seen because before i know it Aden is sitting up and sitting next to me with his arms around my waist.

“Its going to be okay Lex. They will let us be together.”

“They will. Even if it kills me.” I lean my head against his “I love you.”

“I love you too.” He smiles and grabs my hand, squeezing it.

“Hey you two,” Clarke walks back in and I can see a small smile on her lips. “You guys wanna come to Raven’s with me. I needed to pick up some of my homework that she hasnt gotten to me yet.”

“Then can we go see uncle Lincoln?” Adens eyes shine. “And can we take the kitten too?” He holds it up like an offering and looks between Clarke and I. I see Clarke shift her weight and her hand comes up to rest on her side as her face grimaces.

“How about you leave the kitten here with Clarke and you and I run over there to get her homework for her and then see uncle Lincoln on the way back, yeah?” Aden nods his head and hands the kitten to Clarke.

“Lexa, I can go get my homework, honestly.” She gently runs her fingers on the cat's back.

“No Clarke, you need to rest and not to move much.”

“But I-” She tries to argue but i put my hand up to stop her.

“No.” I say sternly and she narrows her eyes. I lean forward and kiss her head. “We will be back shortly.” Her face becomes gentle and I see a slight blush forming on her cheeks.

“Okay.” She makes her way to her bed where she sits down and begins playing with the kitten. I close the door softly behind us and we make our way to Raven and Octavia’s dorm room. The door was cracked so I slightly knock and step in. To my surprise I see Anya on top of Raven in a heavy make out session.

“Gross, get your tongue outta each other's throat, children present!” Anya literally jumps off of Raven, she stumbles back and falls onto the ground and Raven sits up quickly. Both are sporting wide eyes, flushed cheeks and disheveled clothing.

“What the hell Woods!” Raven yells. “Have you ever heard of knocking?”

“Again, Children are present watch your language Reyes.” I motion towards Aden and Raven covers her mouth with her hand. “ And I did knock, you two were a touch...occupied.”

“Hey kiddo.” Anya has recovered and made her way over to Aden, giving him a hug.

“Hi aunt Anya.” Aden hugs her tightly. “Ive missed you.”

“Ive missed you too.” She ruffles his hair which draws a giggle from him.

“We just came to pick up Clarkes homework.” 

“Oh sh-crap I forgot to get those over there to her.” She catches herself before cursing again. “Let me grab them.” She jumps off the couch and goes into her room on the right.

“So, are you two official?” I quirk an eyebrow at her.

“Yeah...that was kinda the result of me asking her to be my girlfriend.” She picks at her nails nonchalantly. 

“You dog.” I laugh and punch her in the arm and she just smirks at me. “I'm happy for you two.”

“Thanks, I am too.” Raven walks back out and hands me a folder with Clarke’s homework.

“Ive been waiting to see if Clarke and Lexa will make a move like you two.” Aden says, I turn around and look at him with wide eyes.

“Excuse me?”

“What? You two slept together and you kissed her head this morning but I havent seen any lip action.”

“Lip action?” Raven bursts into laughter. “I like this kid.” She gives him a high five.

“There is no lip action going on, especially in front of you!” I gape at him. “Where did this idea even come from.

“You two like each other. You should express it and make a move.” He shrugs his shoulder.

“We are so not having this conversation.” I push him towards the door, away from Raven who is bent over laughing and Anya who is laughing almost as hard. “You two suck.” I call over my shoulder before I close the door behind us.

“Its true though.” Aden says after a few minutes. “You should make a move. No time like the present.”

“How old are you again?” He just rolls his eyes at me. “Listen Aden,” I stop and bend down on my haunches. “She has a lot going on, just getting out of the hospital and stuff. And I have a lot going on with the court system and trying to adopt you and...And I don't want to take my attention off you and whats important.” He looks back and forth between my eyes.

“I like Clarke though. And she is important.” He puts his hands on my shoulders. “I want her to be a part of our future Lex, but I want that future to start soon. Don't let her get away.” That hit me like a ton of bricks, this 7 year old opening my eyes and encouraging me to let Clarke in, let her be a part of our future. The three of us together. My heart beats faster at the thought.

“Come on lets go see uncle Lincoln.” I stand and take his hand as we walk towards Lincolns.

 

______________________________

 

We make it back into the room after going to the local park with Lincoln to find Clarke and the kitten asleep. The cat opens its eyes slowly and stretches before jumping off the bed and coming to greet us. Aden immediately drops to the floor to pet it. Gustus had called while we were gone, saying he was ready to take Aden back. I kneel by Clarkes bed and I brush some of her golden curls from her face.

“Clarke, Aden has to go, he wanted to say bye.” Her eyes slowly open. Deep blue pools locking with green forests. “Hi.” I smile softly.

“Hey you.” Her voice is raspy and I see her eyes drop down to my lips. It takes a lot of willpower not to lean in and just kiss her. She looks so beautiful just waking up. But Aden is here.

“Aden is leaving.” I motion behind me, breaking the trance between us. She sits up and swings her legs over the side of the bed. I stand up as well.

“I had a lot of fun with you Aden.” She pulls him into a hug and he reciprocates fully. “Cant wait until next time.” 

“I cant wait to come back, I had a lot of fun.” He pulls back and smiles widely at her before moving to me. “Thanks Lex. I love you.” He wraps his arms around me and i do the same.

“I love you too buddy. I miss you already.” I put my hand out and he does the same as we do our handshake that we created years ago. Its something of a special connection between him and I. I walk him down to the lobby where Gustus is waiting.

“Lexa.” Gustus nods his head in greeting and I do the same. “You have the court day in twelve days.”

“Yes I know Gustus.” I say stiffly. Him implying I didn't remember put a bad taste in my mouth. Him thinking I would let something else take my attention from getting custody of Aden makes me angry.

After they leave I go back up to the room where Clarke and the kitten are playing.

“You brought me a kitten.” She says factually right when I walk in.

“I did.” I sit on the floor across from her

“Thats one of the sweetest things anyone has done for me.” She looks up and smiles widely.

“I knew you liked cats, and you just got out of the hospital." I shrug. "Which I did try sneaking a kitten in there but it didnt work too well.” I mumbled as I run my hand across the carpet, the kitten chasing after it.

“Youre too cute.” She laughs and leans over to kiss me on the cheek, I cant help but smile back.

“So, I have a game soon. Youre still coming to support your team right?” I ask as I pet the kitten.

“Well of course I am. I wouldnt miss it.”

“Are you going to be okay to walk that far?” 

“Yes Lexa, ill be fine. Its not like I just had a heart transplant or anything.” She smirks and I just nod my head.

“Are you sure you're feeling okay?” I cant keep the concern from lacing my words.

“Yes I promise i'm fine.” She says softly. “Now where is my homework from Raven's place?”

“Oh right.” I stand up and grab the folder off the desk. “I caught Anya on top of Raven making out when I went to retrieve this.” I smiled at the memory

“Oh my goodness really?” She laughs and starts looking through her sheets of homework. “So are they officially together now? She sure didnt tell me.” 

“They just made it official right before Aden and I got there apparently. The make out session was the result.” We both laugh and fall into a nice silence until Clarke’s phone beeps.

“Speaking of the devil.” She types back a text quickly. “Raven is bringing lunch and wants to talk.” She smiles and shakes her head.

“Well i will leave you two to your talk and i'm going to hit up the gym before the game later.” I stand up and grab my snapback off the hook on the wall. “ Do you need anything?” I turn around to see Clarke watching me but she looks away quickly.

“Uh yeah no i'm good thanks.” She clears her throat as her cheeks pinken.

“What is that look?” I ask with a slight laugh.

“What look?” She says innocently and doesnt meet my eyes.

“The one you just had when you were looking at me Clarke.” I cant help but smirk when her blush darkens even more.

“I dont know what your talking about Lexa.” She bites her lip

“Clarke.” She looks up at me and I lean over, getting in her personal space.

“Lexa.” She narrows her eyes and I lift an eyebrow in question. “Ugh fine its just that....that you look really…” She moves her hands up and down in motion at me. “...Hot...honestly.” she looks away and my smile grows even more.

“You think I look hot huh?” I lean closer which brings her eyes back to mine. “I think you do too Clarke.” I wink and back away. “Ill see you at the game.” 

 

_________________________________

 

 

Tonights team we are going against is one of the hardest in the league. The first half goes by with few fouls from both sides. They might be a hard team but they are not mean. Everyone has had good sportsmanship throughout the whole game. By the end of the second half there were even some laughs involved. But the score was tied when the buzzer went off. Taking us into a five minute over time. 

There was one minute left on the board when Anya passed me the ball and I ran it up court. She screened some one for me and i tricked out another one of the girls then passed it to Echo as I ran into the middle where no one was looking giving Echo a perfect opportunity to pass me the ball. She passes it around the girl who is blocking her and it slips right into my hand, I turn around and everything seems to stop as I jump and shoot, the way the ball left my fingertips, I knew this was going in. And it did. Swoosh, nothing but net. The buzzer blares and the crowd erupts in cheers. My team mates pretty much tackle me and everyone starts chanting “Grounders! Grounders! Grounders!” I felt free in that moment, like there was nothing else to worry about. The adrenalin pumping through my veins, making my ears pound is something I live for.

“Great shot Woods!” Indra claps me on the back and then I see Clarke running at me and I barely have enough time to open my arms before she throws hers around my neck.

“We won!” She exclaimed. “That last shot before the buzzer went off was so perfect! Nothing but net!”

“Thank you Clarke.” I laugh and can't help this hot feeling inside my stomach of her being proud of me and also being here in my arms.

“You did so good!” Suddenly she leaned in and her lips were against mine and i swear everything around us stopped. Only thing I could hear, feel, smell, see and taste was Clarke. Just as quickly as it started, it ended. She pulled back with wide eyes. “I...uh...I'm gonna go tell everyone else how...uh good they did.” I could see her swallow hard as she slipped her arms from my neck. All I could do was nod. She slipped from my grasp and got lost in the crowd.

“Holy hell dude, did Clarke just kiss you?” Echo clapped me on the back.

“I uh...I think so.” My fingers touched my tingling lips as a smile spread across my face.

After the crowd calmed down and everyone got showered several people wanted to go and celebrate but we decided to save the celebration for friday. I finally made it to the door of my dorm and slipped inside. The only light was coming from the lamp beside Clarke's bed where she was leaning back against the wall with a book in her hand, her blue eyes peeking over the top of the book staring at me. She was wearing a tank top, sweatpants and her hair was up in a messy bun. She slowly brings the book down from covering her face. Thde kitten is fast asleep in the bed beside her.

“I figured you all would have gone out to celebrate.” Her voice was small. She stands up and busies herself with something at the desk.

“We decided to wait until Friday.” She nods and I drop my stuff at the end of my bed. I wasnt going to let the kiss go unmentioned. Thts the only thing thats been on my mind since her lips left mine. I couldnt wait to get back here to her. “Clarke?” I slowly make my way to her. Her back is to me and i'm much closer than she thought when she turns around.

“Yes Lexa?” Her eyes are wide as she watches me move even closer.

“You kissed me tonight.” Her cheeks flush and she fidgets with the book in her hand as she takes a step back.

“I did.” She licks her lips unconsciously.

“You ran away after you kissed me.” I take another step forward and she takes another one back.

“I-i didnt run…I just-” She stops speaking when her back hits the wall and I cant help but smirk at the slight bit of panic that I see run through her eyes.

“You didnt give me enough time to respond.” I lift my hand twirl one of her loose golden locks around my finger. 

“Yo-you wanted to respond?” She swallows hard as I bring my other hand to rest on the wall beside her head. I hear a thud as she drops the book from her hands as they come up to grip the front of my shirt.

“Yeah...I really did.” I tuck that strand of her hair behind her ear. “Can I respond now?” She nods her head quickly. “Will you run away again?” She shakes her head. I slide my hand to the back of her neck. “Good.” I smile just before I lean in and capture her lips with mine. Its tentative and slow and her lips are soft and slightly chapped but so perfect. I pull back ever so slightly and brush my nose against hers to change the angle. This angle my tongue slips out and touches her bottom lips, asking for access, which she agrees too quickly. After a bit I slowly pull away.

“Wow.” She whispered as her eyes were still shut. “I could get used to that.” She’s breathless and so am I.

“Agreed.” I kiss her nose and neither of us can keep the smiles from my face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am SOOOOO sorry I havent updated in forever. A lots been going on (Done with college! Woot!) And ive had writers block. Butttt I hope you all enjoyed this! And get ready for some good ole fashioned fluff soon! :D Leave comments of your thoughts pleaseeee they help!


	11. Yes<3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fluffffffff

“Wait… she just threw you against a wall and kissed you?” Raven exclaimed. I'm sitting on the floor of Raven and Octavia’s cramped dorm room. It had been merely forty eight hours since Lexa’s lips touched mine. The girls had asked me over for a sleep over that was meant to help us study, but we all knew studying wouldn't happen. So instead we are all sitting on the floor with a box of chocolate chip cookies and a bag of sour patch kids both half eaten.

“I technically kissed her first Raven.” I pop a green sour patch kid into my mouth. “And she didnt throw me against the wall. I just sorta...got backed up into it.” I shift in my seat just thinking about it. How her lips moved so perfectly against mine. As if on cue, my phone vibrated next to me, i unlock it quickly to see Lexa’s name.

Lexa: Hey you, how's the studying coming along?

Clarke: It's sorta none existent tbh...

“I cant believe you kissed bad ass asshole queen.” Octavia says before she takes a sip of her chocolate milk.

“She’s not an asshole.” I defend.  
Lexa: How does that not surprise me ;) I can only imagine how much jibber jabber is going on between the three of you.

Clarke: Jibber jabber? Really? Lol.

 

“Do you not remember the first time we met her? She literally almost slammed the door in your face.” Octavia reminds me.

“And she made you cry.” Raven narrowed her eyes at the memory of Lexa going off on me after I missed the big game.

“Yeah okay but...She is a really great person you guys.” I plead as I look back and forth between them. “She makes me feel something.”

Lexa: Are you making fun of me Miss. Griffin?

Clarke: I would never Miss. Woods ;)

“Yeah as long as she stays that way. I sure would hate to beat the shit out of her with the new moves Lincoln has taught me.” Octavia smirks.

“Yeah don't you have a match soon? So we can all watch you beat the living daylights out of someone?” Raven asks.

“My first match is next week!” I cant help but laugh at the contrast of her sounding like a thirteen year old who just got concert tickets to see the Jonas Brother, but instead its to her own show to punch someone repeatedly. “And you both better be there!”

“We will, we will.” I laugh.

Lexa: Hm you think you are funny.

Clarke: I am funny, and you know it ;)

Lexa: Ehhh. I do suppose I should leave you be so you can enjoy your friends. I will talk with you tomorrow?

Clarke: Yeah I guess so, other wise they might take my phone and start telling you embarrassing stories about me. And absolutely! :)

Lexa: Well in that case, I shall continue to text you in hopes of that happening ;)

Clarke: Not a chance! Goodnight Lexa :)

Lexa: Goodnight Clarke :)

“You're texting her right now arnt you?” Octavia asks.

“What? No. I mean i was but we just said goodnight.” I quickly shove the phone into my shorts and pray that neither of the girls are in the mood to try and steal it from me.

“Hmm.” Octavia eyes me. “But in other news, how are you and Chiseled Cheeks?” Octavia smirks at Raven who bites her lip.

“Chiseled Cheeks?” I laugh at the nickname for Anya.

“Yeah! Have you seen her face? Its like...damn, it looks like its carved from stone. Strong and sexy.” Octavia wiggles her eye brows.

“Hey! Back off, thats my girlfriend you're talking about.” Raven shoves Octavia who falls over laughing. “What about your boy?”

“You mean man?” Octavia nearly moans from her position on the floor. “He’s so amazing you guys! He is so sweet and caring and strong and hella fine and just so perfect.

“His body looks like its carved from stone.” I say as I remember back to seeing him at the gym with no shirt.

“You are right about that! I love it. I….I love him honestly.” She sits up at this point and pulls her legs up to her chest. “I think he is the one you guys.” She looks vulnerable but hopeful.

“That is great, O! He is a great guy. I know he would care for you and treat you right.” I grab her hand and squeeze it.

“And if he’s not, we can take him i'm sure.” Raven shrugs and Octavia laughs.

“Thanks guys. But Its time for us to either study or to sleep...I vote for the latter.”

“Agreed.” Raven and I say in unison.

________________________________________

 

Its been a week since the night Lexa and I have really had anytime together alone. Since then we have barely had time to see each other with work and tests getting in the way. But tonight was different, I was sitting in the library cramming for a art history class when I feel a hand on my back. I turn around a bit startled but my face breaks out into a smile when I see those bright green eyes looking down at me. She is wearing a loose white v-neck shirt, with black skinny khakis that have a few rips in them. Her hair is down and straightened.

“Lexa.” I breath and slip my headphones from my ears.

“Hello Clarke, sorry for startling you, you just had your headphones in.” She shrugs and sits in the seat beside me and puts a bag on the table. “I brought you some food though.” She pulls out a box from the bag with a hamburger and fries.

“You snuck food into the library?” I take the hamburger happily. I hadn't realized how hungry I was until the smell of the food hit my nose. “You little rebel.”

“Of course i'm a rebel, it makes life more fun. And I knew you hadn't eaten and we couldn't have you starving while studying.” She winks and my heart literally skips a beat. 

“Thank you Lexa.” I lean over as my hand slips to the back of her neck, bringing her closer, I kiss her lips slowly but meaningful, her hand is on my knee and I cant help but smirk when her hand tightens on my knee when i bite her lip. I pull back slowly, her eyes are half lidded and her lips are parted.

“Well damn, if I get a thank you like that every time I bring you food, then I need to do it more often!” She grins widely and I can't help but smile back before taking a bite of my hamburger. 

“Only if you're lucky.” I wink but squeak when she pokes my side. “Stop that!” I hiss and grab her hands from my side, holding them tightly.

“I don't believe in luck Clarke.” She leans closer to me. “I believe in skill and working for what I want.” My breath catches in my throat as I see the desire in her eyes.

“Well you better work extra hard.” I nearly whisper.

“My skills are already working arnt they though?” She leans in closer and I feel her breath on my lips. It takes all my willpower to pull away from her before her lips reach mine.

“No way, you're way too distracting!” I laugh and she sits back in her seat, chewing her fry.

“How is studying coming?” She asks like nothing had just happened, like she hadnt just got me all hot and bothered in a matter of minutes of her being here.

“Its coming along slow.” I clear my throat and try to steady my breathing. “But i'm nearly finished!” 

“Thats great. And your test is tomorrow?” I nod as I take another bite of my hamburger. “Well can you take a break?” She takes another fry.

“For you? I guess so.” I shrug but smile as i look down to grab another fry but suddenly Lexa’s hand is grabbing mine and she is pulling me from my seat and into the stacks of books. We weave our way to the back row where most people don't go, and I cant help the exciting feeling deep in my stomach as she pulls me along until we suddenly stop and she leans against the book shelves on the wall and pulls me into her. My arms wrap around her neck as hers wrap around my waist and our lips connect in a heated kiss. I push against her trying to bring our bodies closer together, I whimper slightly as she bites my lip which only makes her smirk.

“Damn it Lex.” I breath and kiss her again. “We cant be doing this, I have to study.” Her hands slip into the pockets on the back of my jeans.

“Do you want me to stop so you can study more?” She begins to trail kisses from my lips down to my neck.

“I...I...shit.” I moan as I feel her leave her mark on my collarbone.

“Are you going to be able to focus enough to study?” I can feel her smirk against my skin.

“Probably not.” I slip my hands from around her neck down to her hips and slip my hands just inside her shirt to feel her skin.

“Didnt think so.” She kisses my lips again and I know they will be bruised and swollen from this makeout session when we are finished but i don't give a damn at this point and I'm sure I wont when i'm finished either.

“Ahem.” A voice sounds behind us and we jump apart like lightning struck us. 

“M-Monty? Hey! Uh…” I see Lexa scratch the back of her head. “We were just um.” I stumble over my words and try to think of anything to say to answer for the reason I was lip locking with this beautiful woman with my hands up her shirt and her hands in the pockets of my jeans and her mark on my neck. “Studying…?” I say lamely.

“Righttt. Studying. Is it for anatomy class?” He smirks “No? I guess not because i'm taking anatomy and neither of you are in there with me.” He raises his eyebrow.

“We...I uh.”

“I'm just messing with you Clarke, don't let me interrupt, I just need that book thats behind your girls shoulder.” He points to Lexa who quickly moves out of the way with her hands in her pockets and a slight blush on her cheeks. “Thank you. Carry on!” He quickly turns and is down another stack of books within seconds.

“Well that was...something.” Lexa laughs awkwardly and I cant help to giggle which brings a genuine laugh from her as well. “A friend of yours?”

“Yeah, I met him spring break last year when I came to visit Raven and Octavia. Hes a great guy.” I intertwine my fingers with hers. “Come on lets go back.” we weave our selves through the books and sit back down at our table. I slide the hamburger to her and a smile graces her lips as she picks it up and takes a bite.

“Thank you.” She says after she swallows. “So Octavia has her first real match soon. Are you going to be there?”

“Of course! I wouldnt miss seeing one of my best friends beat the shit out of someone just for the hell of it.” I cant help but grin as a laugh bubbles from Lexa’s lips. “Will you be there?”

“Yeah as long as you were going then so was I.” She reaches for my hand and turns it up on the table and begins to run her pointer finger over the lines of my hand. “ I kinda need to get Octavia and Raven on my side since i'm dating you and they think i'm a complete asshole.” She sighs as she watching her own finger make patterns on my hand which is tingling in a good way. “Which I guess they have a right too and such.”

“Youre not an asshole Lex. You were just...judging before you knew me.” I smile slightly at her and she looks up to meet my eyes.

“Yeah which makes me an asshole.”

“Maybe so. But that didnt stop me from falling for you.” I lean over and kiss her lips gently. “Youre just my asshole, how bout that?” I smile widely and so does she.

“Yeah okay I can deal with that.” She kisses me again quickly. “But I do have to get on your friends good side.”

“They are dating your best friend and cousin, i'm sure they are saying good things in your honor. As am I, just so you know.” I wink at her. “But going to her boxing match will help, just show your interest in them and it will be fine.”

“You think so?” She interlocks her fingers with mine and I nod. “How are you feeling?” Her eyes look down at my stomach.

“Pretty alright. They are taking out my stitches this week so i'm excited about that.”

“And...Did they do anymore tests to make sure they...got everything?” Lexa’s leg bounces with slight nerves. 

“Yes, they did yesterday and everything is fine. I'm clean as far as they can tell.” The doctors seemed happy with the results and with how fast i'm healing. They seemed to think I would be good as new...minus a kidney.

“Okay, just checking.” She nods but her leg still bounces. I put my free hand on her knee.

“Hey, i'm okay, everything is okay.” I smile and she does too slightly. “But what wont be okay is my grades for this damn test if I don't get back to studying.” I laugh and pull my hand from her knee but keep my other one interlocked with hers.

“Okay, what can I do to help you, beautiful?” She smiles widely and I could get lost within that look.

____________________________

The lights are bright but it still feels dark and in this small boxing arena. Octavia's big first match is tonight and I'm making my way through the crowded area to try and find the locker rooms where I know Octavia would be pacing from her nerves. There is a big burly guy standing in the way of the door when I find the locker rooms.

“Hi, excuse me i'm friends with Octavia and I wanted to see her before she went out?” I ask rather than state because his man looks rather scary with his big muscles and long beard.

“No can do.” His voice is gruff.

“Its okay Nyko, she’s with me.” A voice behind me says. I turn to see Lincoln making his way to me. He puts his hand on my shoulder and the big man-Nyko, moves to the side to let us pass. 

“Thanks so much Lincoln, I thought he was going to eat me alive.” Lincoln and I haven't ever had much time to get to know each other, but I do know that he makes Octavia happy and he is respectful to her and isnt just another asshole trying to get into O’s pants.

“Nyko?” Lincoln laughs. “Nah, hes a big teddy bear. He just looks scary.” We make our way to a door at the end of the hall way.

“Is she nervous?” I whisper and he nods before opening the door. And just as I thought, Octavia was pacing back and forth in her small changing room. “Hey hun.” She stops passing and her worry lines on her forehead flatten out as she smiles widely at me and wraps me up in a big hug.

“Clarke! Thank you so much for coming!” She pulls away.

“I wouldnt miss it kiddo.” I touch the side of her head where there are tight braids almost like cornrows going up and into her messy bun. “Who did these for you?”

“Lexa actually.” My eyebrows shoot up in surprise. She smiles and shrugs. “She’s pretty alright I guess Clarke.”

“She is.” I smile widely at the thought of Lexa putting time in to do these braids for Octavia that i'm sure took a long time to do and plenty of opportunity for discussion and interrogation on both ends.

“Youre up in ten minutes babe.” Lincoln says as he grabs some things from around the room.

“And thats my que to go. Kick their ass, sweetcheeks!” I kiss her cheek quickly and step out of the room. I head down the hall and see Nyko leaning against the door frame talking to someone, as I got closer I could see that it was Lexa. She’s wearing black bombat boots with that one pair of black pants that are ripped tucked into the boots and a black tank top with some band on the front. There is on small braid in her wild hair that is brushed over to one side of her neck which gives you perfect view of her tattoo on her arm which is screaming for attention of anyone who looks her way. My heart beats a little faster seeing her here, seeing her look so damn intimidating and hot. Her green eyes spot me coming and the corner of her lips turn up into a half smile half smirk.

“Hello Clarke.” She grabs my hand pulls me in for a small kiss.

“Hi.” I'm breathless and I don't know why.

“So this is the famous Clarke that I hear so much about then?” Nyko’s voice is still gruff but it doesnt have a bite like it did before. “Your name comes up in many conversations from many lips.” He quirks his eyebrow at me.

“I uh...I don't know if thats a good thing or a bad thing honestly.” I laugh nervously.

“Stop being a bully Nyko.” Lexa laughs and pulls me away. “Ill catch up with you later.” She says over her shoulder. “I was wondering where you were.”

“I had to check on O.” We finally find our way to our seats beside Anya and Raven.

“Well finally you two showed up. Couldnt stop fucking for like five minutes could ya?” Raven smirks and I reach across Anya and pucnh her in the leg.

“Shut the hell up Raven, we havent even seen each other today.” 

“Havent seen her face today because its been between your legs or-?” Anya says with a smirk and my mouth drops open in shock but Lexa reaches behind me and smacks Anya in the head, hard.

“You two need to shut the hell up.” Lexa narrows her eyes at Anya and I do the same to Raven. They just laugh instead. Lexa and I haven't gone that far in our relationship yet. Not that we didnt want too, its just we don't want to rush it and we are both fine taking it slow. I mean, the make out sessions are to die for and i'm pretty content with just that for now.

“Ladies and Gentlemen.” The anouncer comes over the speakers. “Tonight we have Octavia Blake in corner one! And Luna Whaters in corner two!” Everyone breaks out into cheers for both the girls. 

The ref goes through the rules with both of the girls and makes them touch fists before stepping back and ringing the bell. The girls circle each other a few times until Luna throw’s a punch at Octavia who dodges it and lands a hit on the side of Luna’s face. The crowd cheers as some boo’s. Octavia sends three quick punches to Luna’s sides which she blocks. 

“They are both pretty good matches for each other.” Lexa says beside me. I nod and lean more forward in my seat when Luna punches Octavia in the face hard enough to make her stagger backwards. Octavia doesnt like that very much because the next thing ya know she is running full force and tackling Luna to the ground and starts punching her. Luna blocks a few hits but definitely not all of them. The crowed is on their feet as they cheer for one or the other. Luna gets the upper hand and flips Octavia on her back where she lands several hits before Octavia gets her leg around Luna’s and flips her over hard and fast and lands several hits to her face before she can start blocking. But by then it was too late and with one last hit Luna gets knock out. Octavia jumps up as the bell rings and Luna’s team comes over to check on her.

“Holy shit that was amazing!” Raven states. Octavia isnt a boastful winner just yet, she goes and checks on Luna to make sure she’s alright. Everyone cheers once the announcer announces we have a new winner who is going on to the next fight.

Raven and I nearly tackle O once she comes out of the locker room.

“That was soooo freaking amazing!” I exclaim.

“Yeah remind me not to get on your bad side like ever, I used to be able to kick your ass but i'm not so sure now.” Raven laughs.

“I feel so alive you guys!” She laughs and high fives Anya and Lexa.

“Good win Octavia.” Lexa says and Anya nods.

“Thank you guys for coming!” Lincoln comes up behind her and wraps his arms around her waist. “We are going out to celebrate at the bar around the corner! Wanna come?” The mention of alcohol makes my stomach churn. The last time liquor has touched my tongue was the night I told Lexa about my cancer.

“I think i'm going to head back home actually if thats okay?” I say and Octavia nods and gives me a hug.

“Ill make sure she gets home safe. You all have a fun night.” Lexa says as she puts her hand on the small of my back and guides me outside.

“You could have stayed and gone with them.” We walk back towards our dorm room.

“I rather be with you.” She slips her hand in mine as we walk.

“Octavia's hair looked good. She told me you did that?”

“Yeah i did.” She ducks her head and a small smile appears on her lips. “Thought we should get to know each other better.”

“Thank you.” I kiss her cheek. We walk in silence for a good bit, listening to cars in the distant or loud music booming from the frat houses. The night air is warm with a slight bit of wind.

“Hey Clarke?” I look over to see Lexa rubbing the back of her neck which is usually a sign of nerves.

“Yes?” I squeeze her hand in reassurance.

“Well like...We are dating right?”

“Right…”

“Well um...Are we exclusive?” My heart beats faster because I don't know if this is going to be a good conversation or not. I don't know if she is going to tell me she’s going on a date with someone else or what. She must have sensed my nerves because she stopped and stepped in front of me, grabbing my other hand as well. “I don't want to be with anyone else. I just want you, I want you to be my girlfriend and I want to be yours, if you will have me?” Her bright green eyes are looking deeply into mine and I cant help the smile that spreads across my face.

“I would love to be your girlfriend Lexa.” I pull her into me and wrap my arms around her neck and kiss her deeply, her arms wrap around my waist and she spins me around, gentle enough not to hurt my stitches but enough to make me laugh and tuck my head into the crook of her neck. This is the feeling of pure happiness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My apologies if this is a messy chapter. I just threw this together quickly becasue its been too long since I have posted and its been killing me! So I apologize for any mess ups or lameness haha. But let me know your thoughts! Thanks friends <3


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